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dylan-dufresne.livejournal.com posting in monaboyd Aug. 15th, 2007 07:00 am)Title: With A Little Help From My Friends - 41/47
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dylan_dufresne
Pairing: BB/DM
Rating: PG-14, ish.
Summary: A mistake changes everything.
Feedback: Would be greatly appreciated as it’s my drug of choice. Many thanks to my beta,frojane.
Special Thanks: Toloki_girl for the exquisite banner that she has created, and to tarnishedhalo for loaning me her inspirational manip for the centerpiece. I am so thankful and appreciative of you both, and your generosity.
Disclaimer: Not at all true in reality. This is my imagination at work.
A/N: For the record, there are days that I hate my Muse. I think it wise to have some kleenex nearby.
Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40
Chapter 41
Thursday morning finds everyone in good spirits and better rested, even when Billy is required to sit down with David to write out his statement, regarding the sequence of events that led to Dom getting shot. Recalling the painful details and committing them to paper is difficult, but Billy manages to get through it, mostly because he keeps telling himself that Dom is alive, and that is worth any temporary discomfort. Additionally, he doesn’t have to worry that they will be targeted again, since David shot and killed the evil bastard who hurt his Dommie, along with so many others.
The next time Dom awakens, Aureen is sitting with him, and while he’s very happy to see his mother, he’s immediately concerned that it means that something terrible has happened to Billy. Even though Aureen fervently promises that he’s fine, Dom becomes increasingly agitated, and it’s only after a nurse finds Billy and brings him to the ICU that Dom calms down. As before, Dom is unable to stay awake for long, because while the pain medication is helping to keep him sedated and comfortable, it also causes him to tire easily.
After Billy has a quick meeting with Viggo and Dr. Baker, the physician assigned to Dom’s care, new tests are ordered, to see how he is healing, and if the reflexes in his legs have improved at all. At this point, Dom hasn’t been lucid enough to realize that sensation in his lower extremities has been affected, but it’s only a matter of time before the truth comes out. The severity of Dom’s injury has yet to be determined, and now that he’s medically stable, there’s no reason not to proceed with the investigation. So, just after Dom’s early evening dose of painkillers, when he drops off for another nap, he’s taken for new x-rays and an MRI of his spine.
The minutes pass so slowly, and even though Viggo waits with him, Billy’s anxiety grows until Dom is wheeled back into ICU, and he’s guided into a small room nearby. Eyes wide, Billy stares at the series of light boxes that line one wall, trying to make sense of the images as translucent films are snapped into place.
“I’m afraid the news isn’t what I hoped for,” Dr. Baker reports, his brow furrowing. “There’s still evidence of an impingement on Dom’s spinal cord.”
“So, his back- it’s broken?” Billy asks hesitantly. “He’s paralyzed?”
“No, the vertebrae are all intact, according this MRI, but there is an anomaly,” Dr. Baker adds, pointing to a spot on a large film. “Vertebrae are normally held in place by strong ligaments and muscles. Right now, one of Dom’s is pushed out of alignment,” the doctor continues, demonstrating with his hands. “It’s called subluxation, and is also known as an Incomplete Spinal Cord Injury. The cord is being compressed here,” he says, returning his focus to the film on the light box. “At T11-T12, and that’s what’s causing the paralysis.”
Billy drags in a harsh breath. “Can you operate? Fix it?”
“We could go in, but it would more than likely make the problem worse, because the spinal cord is so delicate,” Dr. Baker explains. “It’s such an important part of the body, and yet it’s so vulnerable. It’s very soft, about the consistency of toothpaste, actually. Any disruption can cause further damage.”
“So how bad is it?” Billy asks, unable to tear his eyes away from the picture of his lover’s injured back. “What will he be able to feel?”
“He’ll likely have some loss of sensation below the umbilicus, but it’s possible that he’ll have some feeling in his groin,” Dr. Baker reports, his tone as gentle as possible. “Judging by this scan, I think he won’t be able to feel his legs at all.”
While the painful news is absorbed, Billy bites down on his lower lip, trying to imagine how in the world he’s going to tell Dom that he’ll never walk again.
“So that’s it?” he asks flatly. “There’s nothing that can be done? He’ll be like this for- for the rest of his life?”
“When the swelling goes down, if the vertebrae moves back into alignment to relieve the pressure, there is a possibility of some improvement, but there are no guarantees,” Dr. Baker replies. “For as much as we know about the spinal cord, it’s very much a mystery at times.”
“Have you seen someone with this type of injury get better?” Billy asks bluntly. “Or read about it?”
“It is possible,” the doctor concedes reluctantly. “Perhaps with some physiotherapy he’ll be able to regain some mobility-”
“But not likely,” Billy prompts.
“I don’t think it would be fair to give him false hope.”
Sagging in his chair, Billy nods stiffly, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes and a heavy ache forming in his chest.
“If you have any questions, just have the nurse page me,” Dr. Baker finishes, and after exchanging a look with Viggo, slips out of the room to give them some privacy.
As soon as the door closes, Billy curls forward, covering his eyes with his hand, unsteady breathing loud in the quiet room.
“Bill?”
“I just need a few minutes,” he replies softly. “I have to figure out how I’m going to tell Dom.”
“You don’t have to,” Viggo says gently. “I can talk to him.”
“No, he should hear it from me,” Billy tells him, sitting up and turning to face the older man. “I need to be there, to convince Dom that things will be all right; that we’ll get through this.”
“Bill, it’s quite common for people in Dom’s situation to be angry, especially at the person who tells them,” Viggo continues, trying to caution him. “It might be better if-”
“Thank you, but no,” Billy says firmly.
“Okay. But if you change your mind-”
“No time for that,” Billy adds ruefully. “He’ll be awake soon. He needs to know what’s going on.”
“You don’t have to tell him tonight,” Viggo murmurs gently.
“He’s going to figure that something’s wrong, Vig,” Billy says sharply. “He’s getting more alert all the time.”
“I know that, but won’t tomorrow be soon enough? Why not give him one last night before he finds out that his whole world is going to change?” Sitting back in his chair, Viggo arches a speculative eyebrow.
“I don’t know,” Billy muses aloud, uncertainty swirling around him.
“Is twelve hours going to make a huge difference?” Viggo inquires. “You’re exhausted. You haven’t left the hospital for anything. Tell you what: I’ll stay tonight, so you can go home, and get some sleep.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Bill, the human body was not designed to function on an hour of sleep at a time,” Viggo argues gently. “Starting tomorrow, Dom is going to need you, more than ever. More than he’s ever needed you before. A good night’s sleep will help. I think you need it.”
“He needs me more,” Billy protests softly, exhaustion overwhelming him.
“Why don’t you talk to him about it, then?” Viggo suggests. “If Dom tells you to go home, will you do it?”
Billy sighs heavily. “I suppose.”
“I’ll go call Mark and give him a heads up,” Viggo announces, rising to his feet. “Sound good?”
“We don’t know what Dom’s going to say,” Billy reminds him.
“I know Dom,” Viggo says simply. “You two take care of each other.”
Knowing that his friend is right, Billy nods and gets to his feet, following Viggo out into the hall, and while the doctor goes to use the phone, Billy returns to ICU. Dom hasn’t moved in the time he’s been gone, but as soon as Billy sits down at his bedside, Dom’s eyelids flutter open.
“Hey,” he rasps. “You just missed Mum.”
“She was here?”
“Yeah, I told her to take Dad out of here and for both of them to get some sleep,” Dom replies, smiling faintly.
“And she said yes?” Billy wonders aloud.
“They got a room at a hotel just down the street so they can be close by, and don’t forget, I can be persuasive when I need to be.”
“Aye, you can,” Billy agrees, summoning all of his strength to keep a smile on his face.
“You’re next on my list,” Dom tells him.
“List?” Billy repeats, arching an eyebrow.
“I want you to go home, love,” Dom says gently, his eyelids growing heavy once again, much to his dismay. “You’re completely knackered.”
“I’m hanging in there, keeping an eye on you,” Billy argues. “I don’t-”
“I feel guilty, sleeping all the bloody time and you’re just sitting there, waiting for me,” Dom interjects. “You should get out of here.”
“Dommie-”
“I’m not going anywhere,” the younger man adds, knowing that he’s starting to wear Billy down. “I’ll feel better, knowing that you’re curled up in our bed, dreaming of when I’ll be home again.”
“You’re not being fair,” Billy accuses, helpless to resist Dom’s request.
Dom smiles sleepily. “You love it.”
“Aye, I do,” Billy agrees softly.
“Good. Now kiss me before I fall asleep,” Dom murmurs, tipping up his chin. “I want to dream about your lips on mine, and imagine that you’ve just made love to me.”
Smiling at Dom’s endearing romantic streak, Billy obediently leans in close and captures his lover’s waiting mouth in a tender, lingering kiss, feeling the moment that Dom surrenders to his dreams.
“Sweet dreams, my love,” he whispers as he pulls back, ensuring that the blanket covering Dom is tucked in close. “Sleep well.”
When Billy turns to leave, he’s greeted by the sight of Viggo waiting by the nurses' station, a knowing look gracing his features.
“Don’t say it,” Billy warns.
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Viggo replies innocently.
“Just call me if-”
“I will, but he’s going to be fine,” the doctor interjects and then reaches into his pocket. “I’ve called a taxi for you. It’ll be waiting downstairs by the main entrance to take you home.”
Before Billy can protest, several folded bills are pressed into the palm of his hand.
“Thank you.”
“Get some rest,” Viggo requests. “And I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind staying?”
“I’m on duty tonight, so I might need to slip away from time to time, but the nurses know to contact me if Dom so much as twitches.”
“Okay.”
The two men share a brief hug, and then Billy is sent along his way, suddenly very thankful that Mark brought him some clothes and his keys. The level of his bone-deep weariness begins to set in when he nearly falls asleep in the back seat of the taxi, lulled into a doze by the hum of the tires, only to be startled when the driver announces that they’ve arrived at their destination. Billy doesn’t even get the chance to dig out his keys, as the back door of the book shop opens as he steps out of the taxi after paying the fare; Mark’s smiling face greeting him.
“Viggo called,” he explains, guiding the older man indoors and then securing the dead bolt behind him. “There’s a cup of tea upstairs with your name on it.”
“Thank you,” Billy says gratefully. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to,” Mark replies. “C’mon.”
A cheerful blaze is crackling in the fireplace, bathing the living room in golden light and warming the winter air. Before Billy can say a word, he inhales the delicious aroma of something that makes his mouth water, and doesn’t resist as he’s guided over to the couch. Mark disappears into the kitchen, giving Billy the opportunity to close his eyes again, and he has no idea how much time has passed when fingers slide over his mussed hair ever so gently. Surprised at the touch, Billy’s eyes flash open, and then his jaw drops.
“Mags,” he whispers. “When did you get here?”
“Less than an hour ago,” she replies as she sits down to sit beside him. “I was about to head over to the hospital when Viggo called to say that you were coming home.”
It’s at that moment that Billy notices a plate sitting on the coffee table in front of him, filled with chicken, vegetables and baked potato, the food cut into manageable bites, and a cup of tea is there as well, as Mark had promised.
“I should’ve known you would make food,” he comments, not resisting when Maggie slides an arm around his shoulders and draws him close.
“Dom would want to make sure that you ate something with substance,” she offers as explanation, laying her cheek against his hair. “Besides, you’ve been eating hospital cafeteria food for almost a week now. I thought some home cooking would be good for you.”
“It looks wonderful,” Billy says quietly, clearly moved. “Thank you.”
“I’m sorry it took so long for me to get here,” she says quietly. “How are you holding up?”
“I feel like if I closed my eyes, I’d sleep for a month,” Billy confesses. “But I can’t do that. I need to get back to the hospital for Dom.”
“Viggo said he’s doing much better,” Maggie says. “He told you to go home, didn’t he?”
“Aye. He said I looked knackered, and he’d feel better, knowing that I was home, in our bed.”
Maggie smiles. “Now there’s the Dom I know.”
Movement out of the corner of Billy’s eye causes him to look up, meeting Mark’s apologetic gaze.
“I’m going to take a quick shower,” he tells the siblings.
“Wait, where are you sleeping?” Billy wonders aloud, looking at his sister. “You can stay in our room-”
“No way,” Mark interrupts firmly. “You get your own bed. Maggie’s in the guest room, and I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“But-”
A stern look from Maggie causes Billy to trail off, and he mutely agrees with a short nod, watching Mark grin and then disappear down the hall, the loo door clicking shut a moment later.
“You should eat before it gets cold,” Maggie says to Billy, releasing him so she can lean forward and bring the plate closer. A kitchen towel is spread over his lap, and the plate placed on top of it, a fork guided into Billy’s hand.
“Maggie-”
“Eat. We can talk after.”
Letting his body take over the mundane task of eating, providing nourishment to his body, Billy lets his mind wander, trying to recall happy memories, ones that he’ll be able to share with Dom tomorrow, after he’s told about his back. It only feels like a couple of minutes, but it’s nearly fifteen before Maggie slides the empty plate and utensil back onto the table and offers Billy the half empty cup of tea. He’s surprised by the knowledge that he drank some of it while he was eating, as he doesn’t remember it.
“That was good, Mags,” he murmurs quietly. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Distantly, Billy hears Mark’s voice, and realizes that he’s on the phone in the guest room, presumably talking to Emily.
“I think it’s time for bed,” Maggie tells him as she helps her brother to his feet. “You look like you’re about to fall over, love.”
“Aye, I think you’re right,” Billy admits reluctantly. “The idea of sleeping in a bed tonight-”
Maggie smiles gently and nods. “I understand.”
They say goodnight to Mark on their way down the hall to the Master bedroom, Maggie immediately guiding Billy into the loo with pajamas, instructing him to get changed. When he opens the door, also having brushed his teeth and washed his face, he sees that the bed sheets have been drawn back invitingly. Once Billy is tucked in, Maggie walks around to the other side of the bed and settles into a comfortable position.
“Do you want to tell me why you look like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders?” she asks, meeting and holding his gaze.
It’s somewhat of a relief to Billy that he doesn’t have to put on a brave face, and that Maggie is giving him the opportunity to unload, to let her share the burden.
“What’s going on with Dom?” she presses gently. “I know you’re tired, but I get the feeling there's more that you're not saying.”
“It’s bad, Mags,” he chokes out, fresh tears making his eyes glisten. “And I have to tell him tomorrow. I have to tell him-”
Billy pauses to brush at his damp eyelashes, and gives his sister a grateful look when she takes his hand in both of hers, silently offering her support and love.
“Tell him what?” she inquires.
Lowering his head, Billy lets the sad truth pour out along with the tears that he’s been holding back since the moment Dom was shot. For long minutes Maggie doesn’t speak, simply shifting closer, gathering her brother in her arms and rubbing his trembling back as the painful details tumble out. Once the entire story has been explained, Billy falls quiet, completely drained.
“I’m so sorry, love,” Maggie says gently. “I can’t even imagine how you’re feeling right now.”
“I’m not worried about me,” Billy replies softly. “It’s Dommie-”
“I know.”
“He’s going to be devastated. We’re going to have to figure out how things are going to change,” Billy continues, straightening up and attempting to compose himself. “We’ll need to move, since he won’t be able to manage the stairs here, to get up to the flat. I’ll need to get ramps installed downstairs, so he can come by the shop, maybe a car with hand controls, so he’ll be able to drive. That’s after he comes home of course; who knows how long it’ll be before that happens.”
Billy realizes that Maggie is watching him, rather intently, and pauses to arch an eyebrow at her.
“What?
A small smile flutters across Maggie’s lips. “There are couples who couldn’t survive this, people who decide it’s too much. Then there’s you. Here you are, already making plans on how you’re going to make adjustments, so you two can be together.” Glancing down, she reaches forward and cradles the wedding rings hanging on the chain around Billy’s neck in the palm of her hand. “If only everyone took their vows as seriously as you do.”
“It’s not what we planned,” Billy admits, a wee bit misty. “But considering the other options-”
“You just need to take things one step at a time,” Maggie says thoughtfully. “And let your friends help.”
“Aye.”
“First things first, you need to get some sleep. Tomorrow’s going to be a challenging day for both of you,” Maggie finishes, gently urging Billy to lie down, watching as he settles on the pillow. “If you need me-”
“I’ll be fine,” Billy interjects.
“If you need me, I’m just down the hall,” Maggie repeats firmly.
“Thanks, Mags.”
“You’re welcome. Good night.”
“‘Night.”
Billy watches as Maggie leaves the room, switching out the light before closing the door behind her with a soft click, and then he gazes longingly at Dom’s side of the bed. Shifting over, Billy lays his head down on Dom’s pillow and smiles faintly when the light aroma of his lover’s papaya shampoo drift across his nose. Comforted by the familiar, Billy finally lets his eyes close, and in moments he’s fast asleep.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Jarred awake by the sound of voices in animated conversation, Dom peers blearily at a group of what appear to be doctors and nurses talking about the charts of a number of patients. He’s about to close his eyes again when he hears his last name mentioned, and a moment later, several pairs of eyes are focused on him. The voices drop in volume, and the group discussion ends a minute later, decisions apparently been made, as near as Dom can tell. He smiles faintly when a familiar nurse enters his room.
“Good morning,” she chirps. “You’re awake early. It’s only half six.”
“Time is an odd thing when you’re in the hospital,” he says in reply, and then attempts to stifle a yawn. “It seems that I’m not the only one getting an early start this morning.”
“I’m sorry about that.” The nurse’s brow furrows for a moment. “There was a pretty bad car accident this morning, and several people have serious injuries. We’re trying to find some space for them.”
“Oh.”
“However, I have good news for you,” she adds. “Dr. Baker has given the okay for you to move out of the ICU.”
Dom’s eyes widen with surprise. “Really?”
“Just a few minutes ago,” she confirms. “You’ll get a regular room, with a window. Your friends will be able to visit. You’ve come a long way in just a few days, Dom.”
“When?”
“An orderly should be here in about twenty minutes or so,” she says, glancing at her watch.
“Billy-”
“Dr. Mortensen’s already been notified, and he said that he’d call Mr. Boyd, as well as your parents.”
“Thank you. I wouldn’t want them to worry.”
“Just close your eyes. Take a nap.” the nurse advises. “You’ll be getting out of here before you know it.”
“Thank you,” Dom says sincerely, and then obediently closes his eyes, unable to resist the lure of sleep.
As promised, in less than half an hour, Dom is transferred to a new wing of the hospital, rolled into a private room, his bed set up near the window. For the first time in nearly a week, he’s able to see outside, and the snow that has fallen in recent days. Christmas is a few short days away, and a new year. All the excitement tires him out, and Dom realizes that he’d fallen asleep again when he’s startled awake by a knock at the door. An unfamiliar man enters the room, wearing a white lab coat, a stethoscope looped around his neck.
“Mr. Monaghan?”
Tipping his head to one side and blinking sleepily, Dom nods. “That’s me. You can call me Dom.”
“Very well then, Dom. I’m Dr. Millar.”
“Hi.”
“You’ve been transferred to my service, and I, along with some others, will be working with you through the rehabilitation phase,” the doctor explains, opening Dom’s chart and scanning the documentation inside. “Once your abdomen is sufficiently healed,” he says, “we’ll get you into a wheelchair, and then start teaching you how to maneuver yourself around.”
“What?” Dom asks, his eyes widening. “Wheelchair?”
“Probably in another week or so,” Dr. Millar continues. “Independence will be the goal.”
Frowning in confusion, Dom looks down at his feet, and for first time since he woke up in the hospital, he tries to wiggle his toes. The blanket doesn’t move, despite his repeated mental requests for his body to obey him. Until now, he’s spent much of his time sleeping, and breathing too deeply caused discomfort, so Dom made a concerted effort to remain as still as possible. It never occurred to him that his legs wouldn’t work.
“You’re saying that I’m-” Dom gasps for air, his chest constricted. “I’m paralyzed?”
When the doctor notices that his new patient appears to be in distress, he flips through Dom’s medical chart.
“It’s says here that the tests were confirmed yesterday,” he tells Dom. “That’s when you were told-”
The sound of the machine monitoring Dom’s pulse gets louder as his heart rate increases rapidly, the beat now fast and unsteady as a hard lump forms in his throat. Even as he shivers, sweat dots Dom’s brow and he starts to tremble violently, head sinking into the pillow when he feels nauseous, dizzy and lightheaded. The color drains from Dom’s face, and control slips from his grasp, and he’s struck by the odd sensation of feeling as though he’s outside of his body, watching a movie, because surely this can’t be happening. It just can’t.
He doesn’t notice when Dr. Millar pushes the emergency button on the wall above the bed, requesting immediate assistance, and all too willingly falls into the darkness enveloping him, where he can escape to his dreams. Something cold is swiped across his bicep, and then a brief sting is felt as a syringe pierces his skin. The last thought that occurs to Dom before he loses consciousness is to wonder where Billy is, and why he wasn’t here.
Why has Billy left him all alone?
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
It’s a few minutes after eight o’clock when Billy arrives back at the hospital, eager to see Dom, now that he’s moved out of ICU and into a regular room. There, he can sit with Dom, explain what has happened to him, and be there, to comfort his partner as he absorbs the difficult news. Viggo had called just after seven o’clock to inform him of Dom’s move, having just got off the phone with Aureen. It first he’d apologized for calling so early, but was quickly soothed by the news that Billy was already awake.
Maggie and Billy are approaching a nurses’ station on the main floor when Viggo appears, looking tired, but also happy to see them.
“Margaret,” he says warmly. “It’s good to see you.”
“Thank you.”
“Have you seen Dom?” Billy asks quickly. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know his room number, but I know he’s on the fourth floor,” Viggo replies. “There was a bad car accident this morning, and I couldn’t get away.”
“Oh.”
“But I did see Austin and Aureen about twenty minutes ago,” Viggo adds. “They went up already.”
Eager to see Dom, since he was separated from him last night, Billy takes a quick glance around for the nearest lift, and only looks back when Maggie squeezes his hand. At the same time, he’s apprehensive about talking to Dom about his injury, knowing that it’s going to be very upsetting. As much as he hates to give Dom bad news, it’s time that he knows. It cannot be put off any longer.
“Shall we go see him?” she suggests, smiling gently when Billy nods. “Will you be joining us, Viggo?”
“Yes, I’m off duty now,” Viggo reports.
Together, the three make their way upstairs, Viggo taking the lead and guiding them over to a nurses’ station. A petite blonde is standing at a computer station, entering information from a clipboard, and she looks up when Viggo approaches.
“Hi Gracie,” he offers in greeting.
“Good morning, Dr. Mortensen,” she replies. “What can I do for you?”
“I’m looking for Dom Monaghan. He was transferred from ICU this morning.”
Where the young woman had appeared almost cheerful before, a furrow suddenly develops between her eyebrows, and she glances down the hall.
“I think they’re almost finished with him,” she reports. “Dr. Millar is talking to his parents right now.”
“Dr. Millar?” Viggo echoes in confusion. “But he wasn’t supposed to see Dom until this afternoon.”
Alarmed by the nurse’s words, Billy steps forward, belly twisting into tight knots. “What happened? I thought he was- Where is he? I need to see him!”
“Room 1249,” she tells them, her gaze now sympathetic, watching as they hurry past her and down the hall.
Rounding the corner, Viggo stops short, Billy having to dart around him so they don’t collide, and as a result, nearly crashes into Austin.
“What happened?” Billy chokes out, looking around frantically for Dom’s room. “Is he-”
Just then, Aureen and Dr. Millar emerge from a nearby room, and Billy can’t stop himself as he nearly bolts for the door, ignoring the sharp stab of of pain from his ribs. Nothing could’ve surprised him more than when Aureen reaches out and stops him, refusing to let him pass.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, leaning to one side, trying to catch a glimpse of Dom.
“He’s all right,” Aureen tells him, keeping her grip firm as she walks Billy across the hall, away from the door. “He had a panic attack.”
“A what?” Billy asks, his eyes wide. “I have to talk to-”
“No, Billy,” Aureen says quietly, her head lowered. “You can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I’m sorry, Billy, but it’s just not a good idea right now.”
“You don’t understand,” Billy insists. “I have to tell him something.”
Eyes downcast and suddenly bright with unshed tears, Aureen shakes her head. “He knows.”
Billy’s jaw drops open in horror. “What?”
“He knows about his back, about the paralysis.”
“No! I was going to tell him,” Billy cries out, attempting to pull free of Aureen’s grasp. “He-”
“Billy, stop,” she says sharply, desperate to get his attention. “It’s too late. He’s been sedated.”
Immediately, Billy stills. “What?”
“Dr. Millar thought Dom had already been told about his prognosis. As you can imagine, he didn’t take the news well and had a bad reaction.”
“Dommie,” Billy whimpers, his chin quivering, heartbroken at the thought of his lover in pain. “I never meant-”
“He’s torn some stitches as well,” Aureen adds. “They’ve given him something to keep him calm while they fix it, and he’s sleeping now.”
“When he wakes up, I’ll talk to him,” Billy tells her. “I’ll make him understand that we’ll figure it out. Together.”
“Billy, I’m sorry,” Aureen says regretfully. “He doesn’t want to see you, and I’m not about to force him to do anything right now.”
“What? No!”
“When there’s even a mention of your name, he gets upset,” she explains. “I don’t want to hurt you, but I have to do what’s best for Dom. Right now, that’s not you.”
“Please don’t,” Billy begs. “I’ll do anything-”
A pair of arms slips around his waist, and then Maggie carefully draws him back into her embrace. “Billy, love.”
“I can’t leave him,” Billy protests. “Please-”
“Maybe in a few days,” Aureen suggests weakly, cringing internally at the pain in Billy’s eyes. “For now, you should go home.”
“Leave? No!”
“Billy,” Maggie murmurs gently, turning him and guiding his face into the crook of her neck. “You want what’s best for Dom, don’t you?”
“Aye,” he replies miserably. “Of course.”
“That’s what we all want, so let’s do as she says, for now,” Maggie continues. “I’m sure Aureen will call the moment Dom asks for you.”
“I will,” Aureen confirms, her tone soft and soothing. “I promise.”
“C’mon, love.”
Broken and lost, Billy allows his sister to begin to lead him away, but stops when his eyes meet Viggo’s. The doctor hasn’t moved, seemingly frozen in place beside Austin, stunned at what has happened.
In a rush, anger rises up in Billy, pain feeding his fear.
“Bill, I’m sor-”
“Get the fuck away from me,” Billy seethes hatefully. “This is your fault. I never should’ve listened to you.”
“Bill-”
“I was going to tell him last night, but you convinced me not to,” Billy interrupts, glaring at the older man. “You said I should go home, when I didn’t want to leave him. You said twelve hours wouldn’t make a bloody difference!”
“Dr. Millar wasn’t scheduled to see Dom-”
“I don’t care about your excuses,” Billy spits out. “And I don’t want you anywhere near him. Do you hear me? Stay away.”
“Billy!” Maggie admonishes, tugging on his arm, trying desperately to avoid a physical confrontation. In her whole life, she’s never seen Billy act this way, telling her just how deeply her brother is being affected by this morning’s developments.
The hurtful words sting, but Viggo doesn’t deny them, because he knows Billy is right. He did all the things that he’s being accused of, and it doesn’t seem to matter that he never intended this terrible outcome. The last thing Viggo ever wanted was to hurt Billy and Dom, but that’s what has happened, and there’s nothing he can do.
Swallowing a ragged sob, Billy allows Maggie to lead him down the hall, and she doesn’t stop moving forward until she finds an empty waiting room. The long walk has helped to diffuse Billy’s anger, leaving behind a tremendous sadness that is all but crushing his hope. Meekly, he allows her to sit him down on a couch, a now familiar ache spreading through his chest.
“Billy,” she murmurs gently, cupping his cheek and lifting his chin so their eyes can meet. “Love?”
Feeling as though he’s trapped in his worst nightmare, Billy’s gaze is blank as he replays the events over and over, trying to figure out where everything went so wrong. This isn’t how it was supposed to be. He planned it out in his head, how he’d hold Dom’s hand and break the news to him as gently as possible. He was going to be there to reassure Dom that they could get through it, that they would do it together.
Now that dream is lost, and Dom’s never been so far away.
Realizing that Billy needs a few minutes to process, and find a way to somehow accept this heartbreaking turn of events, Maggie falls silent and rubs her brother’s back. She watches the turbulent emotions crash over Billy in waves, the pain in the air almost palpable, and she wonders how on earth the couple are going to find a way back to one another. She can’t imagine how awful is was for Dom to learn of his injury from a stranger, all alone, but at the same time, wonders how either man will survive, knowing how much they’ve come to depend on one another.
Maggie can only hope that when Dom awakens, he will have changed his mind. If not, there will be nothing she can say to ease Billy’s torment, and he will be irrevocably broken.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Heart heavy and weary beyond words, Viggo sighs heavily before mustering the energy to close the front door behind him, then tips his head to one side to listen for sounds of movement. Part of him is oddly relieved when he’s greeted with silence, because it gives him some time to pull himself together, before he finds Orlando and tells him what happened at the hospital this morning. The reprieve is short-lived, however, and as Viggo steps out of the shower a few minutes later, he hears the unmistakable sound of the dogs down the hall in the kitchen, yipping with excitement, their nails scrabbling against the linoleum floor.
It’s a familiar routine that’s been established over the years, Orlando taking their two dogs out for a run in the sunshine, and then joining Viggo in the shower, once the animals have been given their breakfast. Many a morning, Viggo has awoken to the sound of his lover talking to the canines as though they were children, his deep affection for the furry creatures clear, even from a distance.
“Vig?” Orlando calls out.
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“I thought I was going to meet you at the hospital,” Orlando continues, his voice getting louder as he moves towards the bedroom. “See Dom before I went to the clinic.”
“Change of plans,” Viggo says flatly, securing a towel around his hips before exiting the loo.
Puzzled by the look on Viggo’s face, Orlando closes the distance between them and lays a hand on his lover’s damp shoulder. “What happened?”
“I fucked up,” Viggo says simply, utterly drained and defeated. “We got some bad news about Dom last night and I convinced Bill it could wait until morning, and I was wrong. Dom got blind-sided by the news, and now he won’t even look at Bill. Of course, Bill blames me, as he should. It’s a mess, and it’s entirely my fault.”
“Vig-”
“No, let me finish before you try to tell me I’m wrong,” Viggo cautions. “I haven’t told you the worst of it.”
Frowning in confusion, Orlando nods, albeit reluctantly. “All right.”
“Dom’s spinal cord has been compressed at T11-T12,” Viggo reveals, watching as his lover’s brown eyes widen. “No sensation below the umbilicus, and it’s probably permanent.”
“And Billy wasn’t the one to tell him,” Orlando deduces.
Viggo nods tersely. “Yeah.”
“Who told Dom?”
“Millar, from Rehab. He thought Dom knew, so he didn’t sugar coat it.”
“Fuck,” Orlando curses under his breath, shaking his head as he turns away, then drags his long fingers through his dark curly hair. “How’d he take it?”
“Bad,” Viggo replies. “They sedated him, but not before he had a panic attack and tore out some stitches.”
“Where’s Billy now?” Orlando inquires, looking over his shoulder.
“With Maggie. When I talked to Bill this morning, he said she arrived last night.”
Silently, Orlando nods, his slender body unmistakably tense.
“I should’ve called you last night,” Viggo adds. “Asked you what we should do.”
“Considering what’s happened, I wish you had,” Orlando admits. “But there’s no point looking backwards. There’s nothing that can be done to change it.”
“Yeah.”
“How’s Billy?”
“He hates me,” Viggo confesses, a fresh wave of pain stealing his breath. “I’ve never seen him like this. Ever.”
“He’s scared.”
“So am I,” Viggo whispers, his gaze fixed on Orlando’s profile. “Do you hate me, too?”
Surprised at the vulnerability in his lover’s tone, Orlando finally turns around again, and his breath catches. A moment later he’s drawing the older man into his arms, drawing his fingers through damp hair and rubbing Viggo’s trembling back.
“You made a mistake, Vig,” he says quietly, frowning when Viggo flinches at the reminder. “You would never intentionally hurt someone, let alone Billy or Dom.”
“It’s such a mess.”
“Right now, it is,” Orlando agrees sadly. “But give it some time. Dom’s panicking right now. His whole world just turned sideways, and I think it’s reasonable to expect that he’ll need some time to adjust.”
“Bill’s never going to forgive me.”
Biting down on his lower lip, Orlando swallows hard before replying, “You don’t know that.”
For several minutes the couple is silent, arms wrapped around one another, swaying back and forth, Orlando pressing the occasional kiss to Viggo’s temple.
“Did you get any sleep at hospital?” Orlando asks quietly.
“Almost an hour,” Viggo admits wearily. “Twenty minutes at a time.”
A moment later, he squeaks with surprise when the towel wrapped around his waist is tugged loose and when he looks up, seeking an explanation, Orlando leads him over to their bed.
“In you go,” the veterinarian instructs. “You’re exhausted.”
“I can’t,” Viggo protests. “It’s Friday. I’m due at the clinic in an hour.”
“No you’re not,” Orlando tells him. “You switched days with Tommy last week.”
Realization dawns, and Viggo can’t help but sigh with relief as he sinks down on the edge of the bed. “I totally forgot, with Dom getting shot and everything.”
“That’s why I’m here,” Orlando teases gently, taking a seat beside him. “Your personal assistant.”
“You’re a lot more than that,” Viggo replies quietly, cupping his lover’s cheek and gazing deeply into his eyes. “Thank you. For everything.”
“You’re welcome,” Orlando murmurs in reply. “Now lie down. Get some sleep. You’ll feel better.”
“You’re working at the clinic today?”
“Yeah, I have to jump in the shower or I’ll be late,” Orlando tells him, glancing at his watch and grimacing.
“Dinner?”
“Of course.” Rising to his feet, Orlando then guides Viggo’s legs under the coverlet. “Now close your eyes.”
Somewhat comforted by Orlando’s understanding, Viggo rolls onto his side, sinks his head into the pillow and obediently lets his eyelids close. In a matter of minutes, he’s lulled to sleep by the soothing white noise of the water running in the loo.
Meanwhile, Orlando finds himself staring at the ceiling of the tiled enclosure, searching for the wisdom to lead him in the right direction, so he can perhaps help the situation, and not make matters any worse. By the time the conditioner is rinsed from his silky curls, an idea has formed in Orlando’s mind, and once cleaned up and dressed, he brushes a kiss across Viggo’s temple, hoping that his lover is incorrect in his belief that there is no undoing the damage that has been done.
Perhaps there’s something he can do about it.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
It takes over an hour before Maggie is able to get Billy to leave the hospital, and it’s unnerving how silent and still he is during the drive home. Although she searches her mind for something that will comfort Billy, the words seem hollow, even to her, so instead Maggie squeezes his knee before focusing on the road again. Right now, there’s nothing that will make Billy feel better about the situation.
Once they’ve arrived at their destination, Billy wordlessly heads up to the flat above, but Maggie lingers downstairs when she realizes that the book shop is open for business. She discovers Mark at the register, ringing up a sale for a young woman, and once they are alone, she catches his attention.
“Mark, you don’t have to do this,” she begins.
In reply, he exhales heavily and shrugs. “There’s nothing else I can do for them,” he tells her. “All the repairs to the shop are finished, the replacement books have started to arrive, and Christmas is in a few days. Billy’s already lost a week’s worth of business. I thought this might help. Nobody’s more qualified to run this shop.”
“You’re certainly right about that. If you’re sure-”
“I am,” Mark confirms and then frowns. “What are you doing back so soon? I thought you and Billy would be at the hospital most of the day.”
Maggie sighs. “Things didn’t go as planned this morning.”
As quickly as possible, she explains the situation to Mark, tries to reassure him, and then excuses herself to go upstairs and check on her brother. She’s not surprised when she finds Billy curled up on top of the coverlet on the bed he shares with Dom, still wearing his shoes, his scruffy cheek resting on Dom’s pillow. Maggie’s heart breaks, recalling the last time she saw Billy this way, many years ago, after their mother’s funeral, and they’d both retreated to their parent’s bedroom.
“Love?” she whispers as she sinks down on the mattress, slowly reaching out and stroking his mussed hair. “Is there anything I can do?”
It takes nearly a minute before Billy replies, his voice low and flat. “No.”
“Maybe you should try to sleep for a bit,” she suggests. “Rest.”
Shifting on his side, Billy scratches absently at the knuckles of his left hand where they are just visible at the edge of his cast.
“Does your arm hurt?” Maggie inquires. “I can get you some Paracetamol if you like.”
“It won’t help,” Billy says, finally looking up to meet Maggie’s concerned gaze, his right hand moving to rest over his heart. “This is where it hurts.”
When he feels the tears rise up in him like a tidal wave, and he knows he can’t hold them back any longer, Billy buries his face in Dom’s pillow, muffling his anguished sobs as much as possible. Unable to tear herself away, Maggie stays at Billy’s side, rubbing his back and murmuring soothing words as her eyes fill, not stopping until she’s positive that he’s fallen asleep. Mercifully, Billy’s exhaustion has forced him to a place where he can escape for a while, and Maggie can only be grateful for the reprieve.
Moving quietly and carefully, Maggie covers Billy with a tartan blanket that was sitting at the foot of the bed, tucking the material in close around his still form. She fervently hopes that his dreams are peaceful, and that there will be some good news when he awakens. A tender kiss is pressed to his hair, and then Maggie slips out of the bedroom so she doesn’t inadvertently disturb his sleep, closing the door behind her with a quiet click.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Chapter 42
Author:
dylan_dufresne Pairing: BB/DM
Rating: PG-14, ish.
Summary: A mistake changes everything.
Feedback: Would be greatly appreciated as it’s my drug of choice. Many thanks to my beta,
frojane.Special Thanks: To
loki_girl for the exquisite banner that she has created, and to tarnishedhalo for loaning me her inspirational manip for the centerpiece. I am so thankful and appreciative of you both, and your generosity. Disclaimer: Not at all true in reality. This is my imagination at work.
A/N: For the record, there are days that I hate my Muse. I think it wise to have some kleenex nearby.
Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40
Chapter 41
Thursday morning finds everyone in good spirits and better rested, even when Billy is required to sit down with David to write out his statement, regarding the sequence of events that led to Dom getting shot. Recalling the painful details and committing them to paper is difficult, but Billy manages to get through it, mostly because he keeps telling himself that Dom is alive, and that is worth any temporary discomfort. Additionally, he doesn’t have to worry that they will be targeted again, since David shot and killed the evil bastard who hurt his Dommie, along with so many others.
The next time Dom awakens, Aureen is sitting with him, and while he’s very happy to see his mother, he’s immediately concerned that it means that something terrible has happened to Billy. Even though Aureen fervently promises that he’s fine, Dom becomes increasingly agitated, and it’s only after a nurse finds Billy and brings him to the ICU that Dom calms down. As before, Dom is unable to stay awake for long, because while the pain medication is helping to keep him sedated and comfortable, it also causes him to tire easily.
After Billy has a quick meeting with Viggo and Dr. Baker, the physician assigned to Dom’s care, new tests are ordered, to see how he is healing, and if the reflexes in his legs have improved at all. At this point, Dom hasn’t been lucid enough to realize that sensation in his lower extremities has been affected, but it’s only a matter of time before the truth comes out. The severity of Dom’s injury has yet to be determined, and now that he’s medically stable, there’s no reason not to proceed with the investigation. So, just after Dom’s early evening dose of painkillers, when he drops off for another nap, he’s taken for new x-rays and an MRI of his spine.
The minutes pass so slowly, and even though Viggo waits with him, Billy’s anxiety grows until Dom is wheeled back into ICU, and he’s guided into a small room nearby. Eyes wide, Billy stares at the series of light boxes that line one wall, trying to make sense of the images as translucent films are snapped into place.
“I’m afraid the news isn’t what I hoped for,” Dr. Baker reports, his brow furrowing. “There’s still evidence of an impingement on Dom’s spinal cord.”
“So, his back- it’s broken?” Billy asks hesitantly. “He’s paralyzed?”
“No, the vertebrae are all intact, according this MRI, but there is an anomaly,” Dr. Baker adds, pointing to a spot on a large film. “Vertebrae are normally held in place by strong ligaments and muscles. Right now, one of Dom’s is pushed out of alignment,” the doctor continues, demonstrating with his hands. “It’s called subluxation, and is also known as an Incomplete Spinal Cord Injury. The cord is being compressed here,” he says, returning his focus to the film on the light box. “At T11-T12, and that’s what’s causing the paralysis.”
Billy drags in a harsh breath. “Can you operate? Fix it?”
“We could go in, but it would more than likely make the problem worse, because the spinal cord is so delicate,” Dr. Baker explains. “It’s such an important part of the body, and yet it’s so vulnerable. It’s very soft, about the consistency of toothpaste, actually. Any disruption can cause further damage.”
“So how bad is it?” Billy asks, unable to tear his eyes away from the picture of his lover’s injured back. “What will he be able to feel?”
“He’ll likely have some loss of sensation below the umbilicus, but it’s possible that he’ll have some feeling in his groin,” Dr. Baker reports, his tone as gentle as possible. “Judging by this scan, I think he won’t be able to feel his legs at all.”
While the painful news is absorbed, Billy bites down on his lower lip, trying to imagine how in the world he’s going to tell Dom that he’ll never walk again.
“So that’s it?” he asks flatly. “There’s nothing that can be done? He’ll be like this for- for the rest of his life?”
“When the swelling goes down, if the vertebrae moves back into alignment to relieve the pressure, there is a possibility of some improvement, but there are no guarantees,” Dr. Baker replies. “For as much as we know about the spinal cord, it’s very much a mystery at times.”
“Have you seen someone with this type of injury get better?” Billy asks bluntly. “Or read about it?”
“It is possible,” the doctor concedes reluctantly. “Perhaps with some physiotherapy he’ll be able to regain some mobility-”
“But not likely,” Billy prompts.
“I don’t think it would be fair to give him false hope.”
Sagging in his chair, Billy nods stiffly, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes and a heavy ache forming in his chest.
“If you have any questions, just have the nurse page me,” Dr. Baker finishes, and after exchanging a look with Viggo, slips out of the room to give them some privacy.
As soon as the door closes, Billy curls forward, covering his eyes with his hand, unsteady breathing loud in the quiet room.
“Bill?”
“I just need a few minutes,” he replies softly. “I have to figure out how I’m going to tell Dom.”
“You don’t have to,” Viggo says gently. “I can talk to him.”
“No, he should hear it from me,” Billy tells him, sitting up and turning to face the older man. “I need to be there, to convince Dom that things will be all right; that we’ll get through this.”
“Bill, it’s quite common for people in Dom’s situation to be angry, especially at the person who tells them,” Viggo continues, trying to caution him. “It might be better if-”
“Thank you, but no,” Billy says firmly.
“Okay. But if you change your mind-”
“No time for that,” Billy adds ruefully. “He’ll be awake soon. He needs to know what’s going on.”
“You don’t have to tell him tonight,” Viggo murmurs gently.
“He’s going to figure that something’s wrong, Vig,” Billy says sharply. “He’s getting more alert all the time.”
“I know that, but won’t tomorrow be soon enough? Why not give him one last night before he finds out that his whole world is going to change?” Sitting back in his chair, Viggo arches a speculative eyebrow.
“I don’t know,” Billy muses aloud, uncertainty swirling around him.
“Is twelve hours going to make a huge difference?” Viggo inquires. “You’re exhausted. You haven’t left the hospital for anything. Tell you what: I’ll stay tonight, so you can go home, and get some sleep.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Bill, the human body was not designed to function on an hour of sleep at a time,” Viggo argues gently. “Starting tomorrow, Dom is going to need you, more than ever. More than he’s ever needed you before. A good night’s sleep will help. I think you need it.”
“He needs me more,” Billy protests softly, exhaustion overwhelming him.
“Why don’t you talk to him about it, then?” Viggo suggests. “If Dom tells you to go home, will you do it?”
Billy sighs heavily. “I suppose.”
“I’ll go call Mark and give him a heads up,” Viggo announces, rising to his feet. “Sound good?”
“We don’t know what Dom’s going to say,” Billy reminds him.
“I know Dom,” Viggo says simply. “You two take care of each other.”
Knowing that his friend is right, Billy nods and gets to his feet, following Viggo out into the hall, and while the doctor goes to use the phone, Billy returns to ICU. Dom hasn’t moved in the time he’s been gone, but as soon as Billy sits down at his bedside, Dom’s eyelids flutter open.
“Hey,” he rasps. “You just missed Mum.”
“She was here?”
“Yeah, I told her to take Dad out of here and for both of them to get some sleep,” Dom replies, smiling faintly.
“And she said yes?” Billy wonders aloud.
“They got a room at a hotel just down the street so they can be close by, and don’t forget, I can be persuasive when I need to be.”
“Aye, you can,” Billy agrees, summoning all of his strength to keep a smile on his face.
“You’re next on my list,” Dom tells him.
“List?” Billy repeats, arching an eyebrow.
“I want you to go home, love,” Dom says gently, his eyelids growing heavy once again, much to his dismay. “You’re completely knackered.”
“I’m hanging in there, keeping an eye on you,” Billy argues. “I don’t-”
“I feel guilty, sleeping all the bloody time and you’re just sitting there, waiting for me,” Dom interjects. “You should get out of here.”
“Dommie-”
“I’m not going anywhere,” the younger man adds, knowing that he’s starting to wear Billy down. “I’ll feel better, knowing that you’re curled up in our bed, dreaming of when I’ll be home again.”
“You’re not being fair,” Billy accuses, helpless to resist Dom’s request.
Dom smiles sleepily. “You love it.”
“Aye, I do,” Billy agrees softly.
“Good. Now kiss me before I fall asleep,” Dom murmurs, tipping up his chin. “I want to dream about your lips on mine, and imagine that you’ve just made love to me.”
Smiling at Dom’s endearing romantic streak, Billy obediently leans in close and captures his lover’s waiting mouth in a tender, lingering kiss, feeling the moment that Dom surrenders to his dreams.
“Sweet dreams, my love,” he whispers as he pulls back, ensuring that the blanket covering Dom is tucked in close. “Sleep well.”
When Billy turns to leave, he’s greeted by the sight of Viggo waiting by the nurses' station, a knowing look gracing his features.
“Don’t say it,” Billy warns.
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Viggo replies innocently.
“Just call me if-”
“I will, but he’s going to be fine,” the doctor interjects and then reaches into his pocket. “I’ve called a taxi for you. It’ll be waiting downstairs by the main entrance to take you home.”
Before Billy can protest, several folded bills are pressed into the palm of his hand.
“Thank you.”
“Get some rest,” Viggo requests. “And I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind staying?”
“I’m on duty tonight, so I might need to slip away from time to time, but the nurses know to contact me if Dom so much as twitches.”
“Okay.”
The two men share a brief hug, and then Billy is sent along his way, suddenly very thankful that Mark brought him some clothes and his keys. The level of his bone-deep weariness begins to set in when he nearly falls asleep in the back seat of the taxi, lulled into a doze by the hum of the tires, only to be startled when the driver announces that they’ve arrived at their destination. Billy doesn’t even get the chance to dig out his keys, as the back door of the book shop opens as he steps out of the taxi after paying the fare; Mark’s smiling face greeting him.
“Viggo called,” he explains, guiding the older man indoors and then securing the dead bolt behind him. “There’s a cup of tea upstairs with your name on it.”
“Thank you,” Billy says gratefully. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to,” Mark replies. “C’mon.”
A cheerful blaze is crackling in the fireplace, bathing the living room in golden light and warming the winter air. Before Billy can say a word, he inhales the delicious aroma of something that makes his mouth water, and doesn’t resist as he’s guided over to the couch. Mark disappears into the kitchen, giving Billy the opportunity to close his eyes again, and he has no idea how much time has passed when fingers slide over his mussed hair ever so gently. Surprised at the touch, Billy’s eyes flash open, and then his jaw drops.
“Mags,” he whispers. “When did you get here?”
“Less than an hour ago,” she replies as she sits down to sit beside him. “I was about to head over to the hospital when Viggo called to say that you were coming home.”
It’s at that moment that Billy notices a plate sitting on the coffee table in front of him, filled with chicken, vegetables and baked potato, the food cut into manageable bites, and a cup of tea is there as well, as Mark had promised.
“I should’ve known you would make food,” he comments, not resisting when Maggie slides an arm around his shoulders and draws him close.
“Dom would want to make sure that you ate something with substance,” she offers as explanation, laying her cheek against his hair. “Besides, you’ve been eating hospital cafeteria food for almost a week now. I thought some home cooking would be good for you.”
“It looks wonderful,” Billy says quietly, clearly moved. “Thank you.”
“I’m sorry it took so long for me to get here,” she says quietly. “How are you holding up?”
“I feel like if I closed my eyes, I’d sleep for a month,” Billy confesses. “But I can’t do that. I need to get back to the hospital for Dom.”
“Viggo said he’s doing much better,” Maggie says. “He told you to go home, didn’t he?”
“Aye. He said I looked knackered, and he’d feel better, knowing that I was home, in our bed.”
Maggie smiles. “Now there’s the Dom I know.”
Movement out of the corner of Billy’s eye causes him to look up, meeting Mark’s apologetic gaze.
“I’m going to take a quick shower,” he tells the siblings.
“Wait, where are you sleeping?” Billy wonders aloud, looking at his sister. “You can stay in our room-”
“No way,” Mark interrupts firmly. “You get your own bed. Maggie’s in the guest room, and I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“But-”
A stern look from Maggie causes Billy to trail off, and he mutely agrees with a short nod, watching Mark grin and then disappear down the hall, the loo door clicking shut a moment later.
“You should eat before it gets cold,” Maggie says to Billy, releasing him so she can lean forward and bring the plate closer. A kitchen towel is spread over his lap, and the plate placed on top of it, a fork guided into Billy’s hand.
“Maggie-”
“Eat. We can talk after.”
Letting his body take over the mundane task of eating, providing nourishment to his body, Billy lets his mind wander, trying to recall happy memories, ones that he’ll be able to share with Dom tomorrow, after he’s told about his back. It only feels like a couple of minutes, but it’s nearly fifteen before Maggie slides the empty plate and utensil back onto the table and offers Billy the half empty cup of tea. He’s surprised by the knowledge that he drank some of it while he was eating, as he doesn’t remember it.
“That was good, Mags,” he murmurs quietly. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Distantly, Billy hears Mark’s voice, and realizes that he’s on the phone in the guest room, presumably talking to Emily.
“I think it’s time for bed,” Maggie tells him as she helps her brother to his feet. “You look like you’re about to fall over, love.”
“Aye, I think you’re right,” Billy admits reluctantly. “The idea of sleeping in a bed tonight-”
Maggie smiles gently and nods. “I understand.”
They say goodnight to Mark on their way down the hall to the Master bedroom, Maggie immediately guiding Billy into the loo with pajamas, instructing him to get changed. When he opens the door, also having brushed his teeth and washed his face, he sees that the bed sheets have been drawn back invitingly. Once Billy is tucked in, Maggie walks around to the other side of the bed and settles into a comfortable position.
“Do you want to tell me why you look like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders?” she asks, meeting and holding his gaze.
It’s somewhat of a relief to Billy that he doesn’t have to put on a brave face, and that Maggie is giving him the opportunity to unload, to let her share the burden.
“What’s going on with Dom?” she presses gently. “I know you’re tired, but I get the feeling there's more that you're not saying.”
“It’s bad, Mags,” he chokes out, fresh tears making his eyes glisten. “And I have to tell him tomorrow. I have to tell him-”
Billy pauses to brush at his damp eyelashes, and gives his sister a grateful look when she takes his hand in both of hers, silently offering her support and love.
“Tell him what?” she inquires.
Lowering his head, Billy lets the sad truth pour out along with the tears that he’s been holding back since the moment Dom was shot. For long minutes Maggie doesn’t speak, simply shifting closer, gathering her brother in her arms and rubbing his trembling back as the painful details tumble out. Once the entire story has been explained, Billy falls quiet, completely drained.
“I’m so sorry, love,” Maggie says gently. “I can’t even imagine how you’re feeling right now.”
“I’m not worried about me,” Billy replies softly. “It’s Dommie-”
“I know.”
“He’s going to be devastated. We’re going to have to figure out how things are going to change,” Billy continues, straightening up and attempting to compose himself. “We’ll need to move, since he won’t be able to manage the stairs here, to get up to the flat. I’ll need to get ramps installed downstairs, so he can come by the shop, maybe a car with hand controls, so he’ll be able to drive. That’s after he comes home of course; who knows how long it’ll be before that happens.”
Billy realizes that Maggie is watching him, rather intently, and pauses to arch an eyebrow at her.
“What?
A small smile flutters across Maggie’s lips. “There are couples who couldn’t survive this, people who decide it’s too much. Then there’s you. Here you are, already making plans on how you’re going to make adjustments, so you two can be together.” Glancing down, she reaches forward and cradles the wedding rings hanging on the chain around Billy’s neck in the palm of her hand. “If only everyone took their vows as seriously as you do.”
“It’s not what we planned,” Billy admits, a wee bit misty. “But considering the other options-”
“You just need to take things one step at a time,” Maggie says thoughtfully. “And let your friends help.”
“Aye.”
“First things first, you need to get some sleep. Tomorrow’s going to be a challenging day for both of you,” Maggie finishes, gently urging Billy to lie down, watching as he settles on the pillow. “If you need me-”
“I’ll be fine,” Billy interjects.
“If you need me, I’m just down the hall,” Maggie repeats firmly.
“Thanks, Mags.”
“You’re welcome. Good night.”
“‘Night.”
Billy watches as Maggie leaves the room, switching out the light before closing the door behind her with a soft click, and then he gazes longingly at Dom’s side of the bed. Shifting over, Billy lays his head down on Dom’s pillow and smiles faintly when the light aroma of his lover’s papaya shampoo drift across his nose. Comforted by the familiar, Billy finally lets his eyes close, and in moments he’s fast asleep.
Jarred awake by the sound of voices in animated conversation, Dom peers blearily at a group of what appear to be doctors and nurses talking about the charts of a number of patients. He’s about to close his eyes again when he hears his last name mentioned, and a moment later, several pairs of eyes are focused on him. The voices drop in volume, and the group discussion ends a minute later, decisions apparently been made, as near as Dom can tell. He smiles faintly when a familiar nurse enters his room.
“Good morning,” she chirps. “You’re awake early. It’s only half six.”
“Time is an odd thing when you’re in the hospital,” he says in reply, and then attempts to stifle a yawn. “It seems that I’m not the only one getting an early start this morning.”
“I’m sorry about that.” The nurse’s brow furrows for a moment. “There was a pretty bad car accident this morning, and several people have serious injuries. We’re trying to find some space for them.”
“Oh.”
“However, I have good news for you,” she adds. “Dr. Baker has given the okay for you to move out of the ICU.”
Dom’s eyes widen with surprise. “Really?”
“Just a few minutes ago,” she confirms. “You’ll get a regular room, with a window. Your friends will be able to visit. You’ve come a long way in just a few days, Dom.”
“When?”
“An orderly should be here in about twenty minutes or so,” she says, glancing at her watch.
“Billy-”
“Dr. Mortensen’s already been notified, and he said that he’d call Mr. Boyd, as well as your parents.”
“Thank you. I wouldn’t want them to worry.”
“Just close your eyes. Take a nap.” the nurse advises. “You’ll be getting out of here before you know it.”
“Thank you,” Dom says sincerely, and then obediently closes his eyes, unable to resist the lure of sleep.
As promised, in less than half an hour, Dom is transferred to a new wing of the hospital, rolled into a private room, his bed set up near the window. For the first time in nearly a week, he’s able to see outside, and the snow that has fallen in recent days. Christmas is a few short days away, and a new year. All the excitement tires him out, and Dom realizes that he’d fallen asleep again when he’s startled awake by a knock at the door. An unfamiliar man enters the room, wearing a white lab coat, a stethoscope looped around his neck.
“Mr. Monaghan?”
Tipping his head to one side and blinking sleepily, Dom nods. “That’s me. You can call me Dom.”
“Very well then, Dom. I’m Dr. Millar.”
“Hi.”
“You’ve been transferred to my service, and I, along with some others, will be working with you through the rehabilitation phase,” the doctor explains, opening Dom’s chart and scanning the documentation inside. “Once your abdomen is sufficiently healed,” he says, “we’ll get you into a wheelchair, and then start teaching you how to maneuver yourself around.”
“What?” Dom asks, his eyes widening. “Wheelchair?”
“Probably in another week or so,” Dr. Millar continues. “Independence will be the goal.”
Frowning in confusion, Dom looks down at his feet, and for first time since he woke up in the hospital, he tries to wiggle his toes. The blanket doesn’t move, despite his repeated mental requests for his body to obey him. Until now, he’s spent much of his time sleeping, and breathing too deeply caused discomfort, so Dom made a concerted effort to remain as still as possible. It never occurred to him that his legs wouldn’t work.
“You’re saying that I’m-” Dom gasps for air, his chest constricted. “I’m paralyzed?”
When the doctor notices that his new patient appears to be in distress, he flips through Dom’s medical chart.
“It’s says here that the tests were confirmed yesterday,” he tells Dom. “That’s when you were told-”
The sound of the machine monitoring Dom’s pulse gets louder as his heart rate increases rapidly, the beat now fast and unsteady as a hard lump forms in his throat. Even as he shivers, sweat dots Dom’s brow and he starts to tremble violently, head sinking into the pillow when he feels nauseous, dizzy and lightheaded. The color drains from Dom’s face, and control slips from his grasp, and he’s struck by the odd sensation of feeling as though he’s outside of his body, watching a movie, because surely this can’t be happening. It just can’t.
He doesn’t notice when Dr. Millar pushes the emergency button on the wall above the bed, requesting immediate assistance, and all too willingly falls into the darkness enveloping him, where he can escape to his dreams. Something cold is swiped across his bicep, and then a brief sting is felt as a syringe pierces his skin. The last thought that occurs to Dom before he loses consciousness is to wonder where Billy is, and why he wasn’t here.
Why has Billy left him all alone?
It’s a few minutes after eight o’clock when Billy arrives back at the hospital, eager to see Dom, now that he’s moved out of ICU and into a regular room. There, he can sit with Dom, explain what has happened to him, and be there, to comfort his partner as he absorbs the difficult news. Viggo had called just after seven o’clock to inform him of Dom’s move, having just got off the phone with Aureen. It first he’d apologized for calling so early, but was quickly soothed by the news that Billy was already awake.
Maggie and Billy are approaching a nurses’ station on the main floor when Viggo appears, looking tired, but also happy to see them.
“Margaret,” he says warmly. “It’s good to see you.”
“Thank you.”
“Have you seen Dom?” Billy asks quickly. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know his room number, but I know he’s on the fourth floor,” Viggo replies. “There was a bad car accident this morning, and I couldn’t get away.”
“Oh.”
“But I did see Austin and Aureen about twenty minutes ago,” Viggo adds. “They went up already.”
Eager to see Dom, since he was separated from him last night, Billy takes a quick glance around for the nearest lift, and only looks back when Maggie squeezes his hand. At the same time, he’s apprehensive about talking to Dom about his injury, knowing that it’s going to be very upsetting. As much as he hates to give Dom bad news, it’s time that he knows. It cannot be put off any longer.
“Shall we go see him?” she suggests, smiling gently when Billy nods. “Will you be joining us, Viggo?”
“Yes, I’m off duty now,” Viggo reports.
Together, the three make their way upstairs, Viggo taking the lead and guiding them over to a nurses’ station. A petite blonde is standing at a computer station, entering information from a clipboard, and she looks up when Viggo approaches.
“Hi Gracie,” he offers in greeting.
“Good morning, Dr. Mortensen,” she replies. “What can I do for you?”
“I’m looking for Dom Monaghan. He was transferred from ICU this morning.”
Where the young woman had appeared almost cheerful before, a furrow suddenly develops between her eyebrows, and she glances down the hall.
“I think they’re almost finished with him,” she reports. “Dr. Millar is talking to his parents right now.”
“Dr. Millar?” Viggo echoes in confusion. “But he wasn’t supposed to see Dom until this afternoon.”
Alarmed by the nurse’s words, Billy steps forward, belly twisting into tight knots. “What happened? I thought he was- Where is he? I need to see him!”
“Room 1249,” she tells them, her gaze now sympathetic, watching as they hurry past her and down the hall.
Rounding the corner, Viggo stops short, Billy having to dart around him so they don’t collide, and as a result, nearly crashes into Austin.
“What happened?” Billy chokes out, looking around frantically for Dom’s room. “Is he-”
Just then, Aureen and Dr. Millar emerge from a nearby room, and Billy can’t stop himself as he nearly bolts for the door, ignoring the sharp stab of of pain from his ribs. Nothing could’ve surprised him more than when Aureen reaches out and stops him, refusing to let him pass.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, leaning to one side, trying to catch a glimpse of Dom.
“He’s all right,” Aureen tells him, keeping her grip firm as she walks Billy across the hall, away from the door. “He had a panic attack.”
“A what?” Billy asks, his eyes wide. “I have to talk to-”
“No, Billy,” Aureen says quietly, her head lowered. “You can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I’m sorry, Billy, but it’s just not a good idea right now.”
“You don’t understand,” Billy insists. “I have to tell him something.”
Eyes downcast and suddenly bright with unshed tears, Aureen shakes her head. “He knows.”
Billy’s jaw drops open in horror. “What?”
“He knows about his back, about the paralysis.”
“No! I was going to tell him,” Billy cries out, attempting to pull free of Aureen’s grasp. “He-”
“Billy, stop,” she says sharply, desperate to get his attention. “It’s too late. He’s been sedated.”
Immediately, Billy stills. “What?”
“Dr. Millar thought Dom had already been told about his prognosis. As you can imagine, he didn’t take the news well and had a bad reaction.”
“Dommie,” Billy whimpers, his chin quivering, heartbroken at the thought of his lover in pain. “I never meant-”
“He’s torn some stitches as well,” Aureen adds. “They’ve given him something to keep him calm while they fix it, and he’s sleeping now.”
“When he wakes up, I’ll talk to him,” Billy tells her. “I’ll make him understand that we’ll figure it out. Together.”
“Billy, I’m sorry,” Aureen says regretfully. “He doesn’t want to see you, and I’m not about to force him to do anything right now.”
“What? No!”
“When there’s even a mention of your name, he gets upset,” she explains. “I don’t want to hurt you, but I have to do what’s best for Dom. Right now, that’s not you.”
“Please don’t,” Billy begs. “I’ll do anything-”
A pair of arms slips around his waist, and then Maggie carefully draws him back into her embrace. “Billy, love.”
“I can’t leave him,” Billy protests. “Please-”
“Maybe in a few days,” Aureen suggests weakly, cringing internally at the pain in Billy’s eyes. “For now, you should go home.”
“Leave? No!”
“Billy,” Maggie murmurs gently, turning him and guiding his face into the crook of her neck. “You want what’s best for Dom, don’t you?”
“Aye,” he replies miserably. “Of course.”
“That’s what we all want, so let’s do as she says, for now,” Maggie continues. “I’m sure Aureen will call the moment Dom asks for you.”
“I will,” Aureen confirms, her tone soft and soothing. “I promise.”
“C’mon, love.”
Broken and lost, Billy allows his sister to begin to lead him away, but stops when his eyes meet Viggo’s. The doctor hasn’t moved, seemingly frozen in place beside Austin, stunned at what has happened.
In a rush, anger rises up in Billy, pain feeding his fear.
“Bill, I’m sor-”
“Get the fuck away from me,” Billy seethes hatefully. “This is your fault. I never should’ve listened to you.”
“Bill-”
“I was going to tell him last night, but you convinced me not to,” Billy interrupts, glaring at the older man. “You said I should go home, when I didn’t want to leave him. You said twelve hours wouldn’t make a bloody difference!”
“Dr. Millar wasn’t scheduled to see Dom-”
“I don’t care about your excuses,” Billy spits out. “And I don’t want you anywhere near him. Do you hear me? Stay away.”
“Billy!” Maggie admonishes, tugging on his arm, trying desperately to avoid a physical confrontation. In her whole life, she’s never seen Billy act this way, telling her just how deeply her brother is being affected by this morning’s developments.
The hurtful words sting, but Viggo doesn’t deny them, because he knows Billy is right. He did all the things that he’s being accused of, and it doesn’t seem to matter that he never intended this terrible outcome. The last thing Viggo ever wanted was to hurt Billy and Dom, but that’s what has happened, and there’s nothing he can do.
Swallowing a ragged sob, Billy allows Maggie to lead him down the hall, and she doesn’t stop moving forward until she finds an empty waiting room. The long walk has helped to diffuse Billy’s anger, leaving behind a tremendous sadness that is all but crushing his hope. Meekly, he allows her to sit him down on a couch, a now familiar ache spreading through his chest.
“Billy,” she murmurs gently, cupping his cheek and lifting his chin so their eyes can meet. “Love?”
Feeling as though he’s trapped in his worst nightmare, Billy’s gaze is blank as he replays the events over and over, trying to figure out where everything went so wrong. This isn’t how it was supposed to be. He planned it out in his head, how he’d hold Dom’s hand and break the news to him as gently as possible. He was going to be there to reassure Dom that they could get through it, that they would do it together.
Now that dream is lost, and Dom’s never been so far away.
Realizing that Billy needs a few minutes to process, and find a way to somehow accept this heartbreaking turn of events, Maggie falls silent and rubs her brother’s back. She watches the turbulent emotions crash over Billy in waves, the pain in the air almost palpable, and she wonders how on earth the couple are going to find a way back to one another. She can’t imagine how awful is was for Dom to learn of his injury from a stranger, all alone, but at the same time, wonders how either man will survive, knowing how much they’ve come to depend on one another.
Maggie can only hope that when Dom awakens, he will have changed his mind. If not, there will be nothing she can say to ease Billy’s torment, and he will be irrevocably broken.
Heart heavy and weary beyond words, Viggo sighs heavily before mustering the energy to close the front door behind him, then tips his head to one side to listen for sounds of movement. Part of him is oddly relieved when he’s greeted with silence, because it gives him some time to pull himself together, before he finds Orlando and tells him what happened at the hospital this morning. The reprieve is short-lived, however, and as Viggo steps out of the shower a few minutes later, he hears the unmistakable sound of the dogs down the hall in the kitchen, yipping with excitement, their nails scrabbling against the linoleum floor.
It’s a familiar routine that’s been established over the years, Orlando taking their two dogs out for a run in the sunshine, and then joining Viggo in the shower, once the animals have been given their breakfast. Many a morning, Viggo has awoken to the sound of his lover talking to the canines as though they were children, his deep affection for the furry creatures clear, even from a distance.
“Vig?” Orlando calls out.
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“I thought I was going to meet you at the hospital,” Orlando continues, his voice getting louder as he moves towards the bedroom. “See Dom before I went to the clinic.”
“Change of plans,” Viggo says flatly, securing a towel around his hips before exiting the loo.
Puzzled by the look on Viggo’s face, Orlando closes the distance between them and lays a hand on his lover’s damp shoulder. “What happened?”
“I fucked up,” Viggo says simply, utterly drained and defeated. “We got some bad news about Dom last night and I convinced Bill it could wait until morning, and I was wrong. Dom got blind-sided by the news, and now he won’t even look at Bill. Of course, Bill blames me, as he should. It’s a mess, and it’s entirely my fault.”
“Vig-”
“No, let me finish before you try to tell me I’m wrong,” Viggo cautions. “I haven’t told you the worst of it.”
Frowning in confusion, Orlando nods, albeit reluctantly. “All right.”
“Dom’s spinal cord has been compressed at T11-T12,” Viggo reveals, watching as his lover’s brown eyes widen. “No sensation below the umbilicus, and it’s probably permanent.”
“And Billy wasn’t the one to tell him,” Orlando deduces.
Viggo nods tersely. “Yeah.”
“Who told Dom?”
“Millar, from Rehab. He thought Dom knew, so he didn’t sugar coat it.”
“Fuck,” Orlando curses under his breath, shaking his head as he turns away, then drags his long fingers through his dark curly hair. “How’d he take it?”
“Bad,” Viggo replies. “They sedated him, but not before he had a panic attack and tore out some stitches.”
“Where’s Billy now?” Orlando inquires, looking over his shoulder.
“With Maggie. When I talked to Bill this morning, he said she arrived last night.”
Silently, Orlando nods, his slender body unmistakably tense.
“I should’ve called you last night,” Viggo adds. “Asked you what we should do.”
“Considering what’s happened, I wish you had,” Orlando admits. “But there’s no point looking backwards. There’s nothing that can be done to change it.”
“Yeah.”
“How’s Billy?”
“He hates me,” Viggo confesses, a fresh wave of pain stealing his breath. “I’ve never seen him like this. Ever.”
“He’s scared.”
“So am I,” Viggo whispers, his gaze fixed on Orlando’s profile. “Do you hate me, too?”
Surprised at the vulnerability in his lover’s tone, Orlando finally turns around again, and his breath catches. A moment later he’s drawing the older man into his arms, drawing his fingers through damp hair and rubbing Viggo’s trembling back.
“You made a mistake, Vig,” he says quietly, frowning when Viggo flinches at the reminder. “You would never intentionally hurt someone, let alone Billy or Dom.”
“It’s such a mess.”
“Right now, it is,” Orlando agrees sadly. “But give it some time. Dom’s panicking right now. His whole world just turned sideways, and I think it’s reasonable to expect that he’ll need some time to adjust.”
“Bill’s never going to forgive me.”
Biting down on his lower lip, Orlando swallows hard before replying, “You don’t know that.”
For several minutes the couple is silent, arms wrapped around one another, swaying back and forth, Orlando pressing the occasional kiss to Viggo’s temple.
“Did you get any sleep at hospital?” Orlando asks quietly.
“Almost an hour,” Viggo admits wearily. “Twenty minutes at a time.”
A moment later, he squeaks with surprise when the towel wrapped around his waist is tugged loose and when he looks up, seeking an explanation, Orlando leads him over to their bed.
“In you go,” the veterinarian instructs. “You’re exhausted.”
“I can’t,” Viggo protests. “It’s Friday. I’m due at the clinic in an hour.”
“No you’re not,” Orlando tells him. “You switched days with Tommy last week.”
Realization dawns, and Viggo can’t help but sigh with relief as he sinks down on the edge of the bed. “I totally forgot, with Dom getting shot and everything.”
“That’s why I’m here,” Orlando teases gently, taking a seat beside him. “Your personal assistant.”
“You’re a lot more than that,” Viggo replies quietly, cupping his lover’s cheek and gazing deeply into his eyes. “Thank you. For everything.”
“You’re welcome,” Orlando murmurs in reply. “Now lie down. Get some sleep. You’ll feel better.”
“You’re working at the clinic today?”
“Yeah, I have to jump in the shower or I’ll be late,” Orlando tells him, glancing at his watch and grimacing.
“Dinner?”
“Of course.” Rising to his feet, Orlando then guides Viggo’s legs under the coverlet. “Now close your eyes.”
Somewhat comforted by Orlando’s understanding, Viggo rolls onto his side, sinks his head into the pillow and obediently lets his eyelids close. In a matter of minutes, he’s lulled to sleep by the soothing white noise of the water running in the loo.
Meanwhile, Orlando finds himself staring at the ceiling of the tiled enclosure, searching for the wisdom to lead him in the right direction, so he can perhaps help the situation, and not make matters any worse. By the time the conditioner is rinsed from his silky curls, an idea has formed in Orlando’s mind, and once cleaned up and dressed, he brushes a kiss across Viggo’s temple, hoping that his lover is incorrect in his belief that there is no undoing the damage that has been done.
Perhaps there’s something he can do about it.
It takes over an hour before Maggie is able to get Billy to leave the hospital, and it’s unnerving how silent and still he is during the drive home. Although she searches her mind for something that will comfort Billy, the words seem hollow, even to her, so instead Maggie squeezes his knee before focusing on the road again. Right now, there’s nothing that will make Billy feel better about the situation.
Once they’ve arrived at their destination, Billy wordlessly heads up to the flat above, but Maggie lingers downstairs when she realizes that the book shop is open for business. She discovers Mark at the register, ringing up a sale for a young woman, and once they are alone, she catches his attention.
“Mark, you don’t have to do this,” she begins.
In reply, he exhales heavily and shrugs. “There’s nothing else I can do for them,” he tells her. “All the repairs to the shop are finished, the replacement books have started to arrive, and Christmas is in a few days. Billy’s already lost a week’s worth of business. I thought this might help. Nobody’s more qualified to run this shop.”
“You’re certainly right about that. If you’re sure-”
“I am,” Mark confirms and then frowns. “What are you doing back so soon? I thought you and Billy would be at the hospital most of the day.”
Maggie sighs. “Things didn’t go as planned this morning.”
As quickly as possible, she explains the situation to Mark, tries to reassure him, and then excuses herself to go upstairs and check on her brother. She’s not surprised when she finds Billy curled up on top of the coverlet on the bed he shares with Dom, still wearing his shoes, his scruffy cheek resting on Dom’s pillow. Maggie’s heart breaks, recalling the last time she saw Billy this way, many years ago, after their mother’s funeral, and they’d both retreated to their parent’s bedroom.
“Love?” she whispers as she sinks down on the mattress, slowly reaching out and stroking his mussed hair. “Is there anything I can do?”
It takes nearly a minute before Billy replies, his voice low and flat. “No.”
“Maybe you should try to sleep for a bit,” she suggests. “Rest.”
Shifting on his side, Billy scratches absently at the knuckles of his left hand where they are just visible at the edge of his cast.
“Does your arm hurt?” Maggie inquires. “I can get you some Paracetamol if you like.”
“It won’t help,” Billy says, finally looking up to meet Maggie’s concerned gaze, his right hand moving to rest over his heart. “This is where it hurts.”
When he feels the tears rise up in him like a tidal wave, and he knows he can’t hold them back any longer, Billy buries his face in Dom’s pillow, muffling his anguished sobs as much as possible. Unable to tear herself away, Maggie stays at Billy’s side, rubbing his back and murmuring soothing words as her eyes fill, not stopping until she’s positive that he’s fallen asleep. Mercifully, Billy’s exhaustion has forced him to a place where he can escape for a while, and Maggie can only be grateful for the reprieve.
Moving quietly and carefully, Maggie covers Billy with a tartan blanket that was sitting at the foot of the bed, tucking the material in close around his still form. She fervently hopes that his dreams are peaceful, and that there will be some good news when he awakens. A tender kiss is pressed to his hair, and then Maggie slips out of the bedroom so she doesn’t inadvertently disturb his sleep, closing the door behind her with a quiet click.
Chapter 42
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From:
no subject
Amazing how one simple incident can turn things completely around. Dom is going to be angry at Billy for what he perceives as neglect (Billy not telling him in person about the paralysis), Billy is angry at Viggo for suggesting that the news could wait. I wonder what Orlando's plan is (and yes, I know your Muse has this thing about hints). Hopefully, he can do something to, if not diffuse the situation, at least help bring Dom and Billy back together.
From:
no subject
Oh, definitely. I know that from first hand experience.
In short, things are a mess. As for Orlando? Stay tuned.
Thank you.
From:
no subject
yay! for mark and all, but as for the rest? argh fuck! ahhh!
*smacks everyone but mark, maggie and orli upside the head*
From:
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*ducks to avoid the smacking*
Thanks, hon.
From:
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Well I didn't see this one coming, how many more surprises does your muse have for us?
From:
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The Muse? He's full of surprises. He even surprises me from time to time.
Thank you.
From:
no subject
Well another rollercoaster - At first I was all excited - subluxation is good. It's a whole lot better than transection - Subluxations can be fixed (oh and the spinal cord is actually quite firm)- and no doctor worth their salt will say no one will walk or what not until the inflammation dies down and even over time changes still occurs- b/c you really can't tell which way it's going to go. After everything settles down we retest and can give you a better picture of your prognosis.
And I thought spousal rights trump parental rights or maybe that's only in America. So Dom's mom can't forbid Billy to see Dom unless he specifically requests it (that broke my heart)... Ah well. Everyone's hating and depressed. Hopefully things start looking up soon.
From:
no subject
Everyone's hating and depressed. Yeah, pretty much.
From:
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From:
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Ah! I forgot to address that point. Yes, you are correct. Dom is 27 years old, which makes it December 2003, and gay marriage is not legal. While they called it getting married, it was a commitment ceremony.
In the eyes of the law, Billy's only allowed to make medical decisions for Dom when he's unable - like Dom could when Billy was unconscious - because they had legal documents drawn up for that very purpose.
Dom was awake and made his wishes very clear, so that means he can refuse to see Billy. Unfortunately.
From:
no subject
“It is possible,” the doctor concedes reluctantly.
This doctor has never seen someone as stubborn as Dom. :clings to that hope: Dom's alive. That's truly the important thing. I'm keeping that in mind. Billy and Dom would be able to work around this. It wont make Billy love Dom any less if he can't walk. :but if your muse decides not to be a ruthless cruel bastard, we wouldn't mind Dom being able to walk. in case you were wondering:
“I want to dream about your lips on mine, and imagine that you’ve just made love to me.”
lovely dream.
Sucks Dom found out the way he did. Did he forget that he's the one that sent Billy away to get some sleep? It's still pretty early in the day, he can't think Billy's forgotten him or something. If he pulls a stoopid "boy" thing thinking, "he wont want me now" I may be forced to kick him. repeatedly. He's gonna get no sympathy from me. He's alive. ... Billy's alive. After they both so nearly weren't.
“It’s such a mess.”
“Right now, it is,”
It may be a mess, but this one isn't as horrible as they think it is. Really, it's not. Emotions are high and tempers are up, but once the dust settles, I believe this will be worked out.
My guess is Dom doesn't want to see Billy because he's worried he'll be a burden, not because he blames Billy. I'm not sure Aureen is right in keeping Billy out, though. Who has power of Attorney / medical release here? Dom made decisions for Billy, and not Margaret (his next of kin). What's the legal stand on this? (or is Aureen simply acting on mothering instincts, hoping Billy wont challenge her?)
kerry =)
From:
no subject
As for PoA, etc - my feeling is, Dom was conscious when he said he didn't want to see Billy, and was clearly being affected adversely, medically speaking. He made his wishes clear. Billy's too emotionally overwrought to put up much of a fight, and he also knows that Aureen would do whatever it takes to protect Dom.