(no subject)

[morebliss.livejournal.com]

Okay, so I went to write some porn? As you do. And came across a little angsty Monaboyd convo that I'd written a while ago. And it just grabbed me. So I wrote the rest of it (thanks red wine!). It stems from my impression of Billy Boyd being a bit more reticent about his friendship with Dom. And my thoughts that these guys had lives and best friends before they met each other.

Pairing: Billy/Dom
Rating: R (language)
Summary: Eh. One of those awfully honest after sex conversations.
Warnings: It’s not very happy. Dialogue. It’s short though!



What do I have to do to make you fall in love with me Billy?

Dom, …just don’t.

Fuck it, mate! I know we agreed to not ever let emotional shit come into it, and I know you fucking predicted me falling for you first, but …

Shit, Dom, please don’t do this….

Don’t do what, Bills? Don’t what? Don’t let you fuck me? Don’t suck you off practically every morning so we’ll both be in a good mood all day? Don’t fall in love with you?! ‘Cause it’s already fucking past mate! And I’m sick to fucking death of lying in your arms after a great shag and hearing about how you can’t find a partner. ‘Cause I’m right fucking here! And I’m your best friend.

No, Dom. You’re a good mate, and we end up in bed ‘cause we both need comfort here, but you don’t love me like that, and you shouldn’t. And… Fuck! We’ve fucking talked about this! Jesus, I knew, I fucking knew this would happen. I love you as a mate, right? And you have been a bloody godsend during this filming, but I have a life back in Glasgow. With great best friends there. Guys I’ve known longer, and been through more shit with than this. They are my best mates. This is not as much of a life changing experience for me. And I know you think it is for you, and maybe it is, but I fucking don’t want to be part of that. Not in that way.

Fuck. Not life changing for you? I’ve seen you change since the moment I fucking met you! You’re already part of this. And you fucking know it. Fuck you! You can say all that shit after what we’ve been through?

Been through? Jesus, Dom. We’ve been through nothing! Cunting nothing! Do you think for one second that sitting up the top of a plastic tree compares with anything I’ve had to go through before?

Don’t fucking play the dead parent’s card with me again Billy. Just don’t fucking do it. I’ve cried over that with you enough times to know it’s got nothing to do with us.

I wasn’t fucking talking about that, you shit! And there is no bloody us! I thought I made that damn clear when we started this.

Jesus fuck Billy, what the hell am I except for your best friend and boyfriend? I have sex with you, hold you when you’re down - hold you on your fucking couch that I picked out? Yeah, this was supposed to be just a fling for both of us, but I can’t do this any more. Shit. I just can’t. I love you.

Shit. I know. I know. And I knew. I knew it then, that’s why I told you Dom. And I won’t be sorry for it. But, fuck Dom, you know me. And I did make it clear.

Yeah, you made it clear. I guess I was just stupid enough to think I would be the one to change it. I thought the fact that we fit so well together would be enough for you Bill.

Dom…

I see how you look at me Bill. You’re not that fucking good an actor.

Yes, Dom, I am.

Comments

[silentdescant.livejournal.com]

Oh, that broke me. Beautifully done.

[random-yayness.livejournal.com]

*sighs* Why is it always DOM that is broken in these fics? *sniffles, huggles him*

But seriously, this was definitely well-written, and felt very real to me... almost too real! lol Thank you for posting!

[sophia-black.livejournal.com]

Gah, oh god that broke my heart. That last line. So so good though. Wonderful. Great job.