FIC: Making Memories of Us 26/27

[sassywitch.livejournal.com]

Title: Making Memories of Us 26/27
Authors: rawiyaparand and sassywitch
Pairing: Primarily Monaboyd, with a smattering of Ordaisy, Kargo, EmEli
Rating: NC-17 for graphic m/m and shock horror some het sex
Betas: The wonderful surreality_fan Much ♥
Archiving: all_sensation and glasgowhobbit , any others please ask first
Feedback: Yes, please. We live for it.
Header Art: Our wonderful header was created by loki_girl
Crossposted: to monaboyd and all_sensation
Disclaimer: No money was made from this, and this in no way is meant to imply anything about the sexual preferences or practices of anyone mentioned within this story. No matter how true they are.
Summary: Dom is injured, and Billy goes along with the hallucinations for his best friends sake; but is it really only for Dom?
WARNING: contains slash (men doing men), het, angst, and fluff. If any of this bothers you, please don't read. This chapter also contains a smattering of het smut.
A/N: Sorry for the delay it was unavoidable. Next chapter will be posted on Friday.
The song that spawned the fic: Can be found Here
Previous Chapters: Here
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Billy had long ago tuned out the movie that they had been watching. Dom had fallen asleep head on his shoulder, the airline earphones pushed into his ears. They had both laughed hysterically when they had found that Hidalgo, Kingdom of Heaven and Flightplan were the three movies that would be showing for this part of their journey. Even in a plane they couldn’t escape the fellowship.

Turning sideways in his seat, he gently pulled the earphones from Dom’s ears, hearing Viggo’s voice as he did. Dom stirred, his brow pushed into a tight frown. “Vig,” he mumbled “I can’t”. Billy smiled realizing how tired Dom really was one hand reaching out to cup his face and sooth his mumbling. “Can’t tell him.” Dom’s hand touched Billy’s arm, caught up in the conversation he was having inside his head, he shook it in agitation.

“He’ll leave me. He can’t. I ‘member can’t tell not yet.” He muttered.

Billy's hand froze on Dom's cheek, his green eyes widening in horror. He tried to swallow past the lump that had formed in his throat, but found it impossible.

"Can't tell yet, secret. Scotland Viggo; tell him remember Scotland," Dom continued to mumble incoherently.

Billy's hand slowly covered his mouth as his eyes filled with tears. He struggled to unbuckle his seatbelt, the acidic bile rising slowly in his throat. Unbuckled, Billy stood up quickly, running towards the bathroom.

"Excuse me, sir, are you alright?" A flight attendant asked as Billy rushed past her. He was thankful that a bathroom was available and locked it behind him, dropping to his knees in front of the toilet.

"Sir, are you alright?" A concerned voice asked knocking at the door.

"Y..yes," Billy managed to say before losing his in-flight meal.

Hot tears welled in Billy’s eyes as he struggled to control his emotions. Dom remembered, he knew that Billy had been lying to him from the time he woke up. How long had he known, how long had he been playing him for a fool, Billy thought bitterly.

He stood and washed his face with tepid water, wishing he had never heard Dom’s words. Five minutes ago he had been ecstatically happy, now the shards of his heart were hanging together more by luck than design.

He took a deep breath and willed his emotions back under iron fisted control.

“Bills?” Dom’s voice sounded just outside the door. “Are you okay?”

“Fine.” Billy answered succinctly. They couldn’t afford to get into this on a plane, in public. Billy squared his shoulders determinedly. He was an actor. He could do this. He should get a bloody academy award for it, because it would be the best performance he would ever give. Opening the door he stepped out into the corridor, his firm resolve almost melted by the concern on Dom’s face.

"The flight attendant told me that you were sick," Dom said in a worry filled voice. He looked at Billy concerned: his face pale, the once bright, green eyes tired and bloodshot. He lifted his hand to touch Billy's forehead, his hand dropping by his side when Billy leaned away from his touch.

"I…I got you some orange juice and a can of ginger ale," he said quietly walking slowly behind Billy. He stood in the aisle for a moment watching as Billy sat near the window, leaning as far away from the other seat as possible.

"Are you sure you're okay, Bills?" Dom asked again, sitting down. A warning bell was going off in his head but he couldn't quite place its origins. He reached out to take Billy's hand, gasping audibly when Billy pulled away for the second time.

"I think I'm coming down with something," Billy explained, pulling the dark blue blanket around him. "I don't want you to catch it. You're still sick, remember?"

Dom tucked the blanket tighter around him and turned sideways in his seat his worried eyes watching Billy as he huddled under the blanket.

Curled in on himself Billy closed his eyes, willing the plane to reach its destination, praying for the trip to be over so he could put some distance between himself and Dom.

Nothing had changed in his heart, he still loved Dom and needed him with every fibre of his being, but how could Dom when he knew he had deliberately gone out of his way to deceive him. To build the foundations of their life together on a lie was beyond wrong. How could he live with that for the rest of their lives. How much more would he lie about to get his own way. What else would he do to get what he wanted. Billy twisted the ring he wore on his finger, tears welling in his eyes. All it had taken to break his heart was the words Dom had spoken in his sleep.

As the seat belt sign flashed on and the familiar blocked sensation began in his ears he realized that they were approaching their destination. He stilled, barely even remembering to breath as Dom reached around him and fastened his seat belt. Billy longed to just throw himself in Dom’s arms and tell him that he knew, beg him to apologize and explain why he did it. But he couldn’t, instead he curled into the seat pretending to be asleep, even as his heart bled.

Dom sat stiffly in his seat, the skin of his bottom lip breaking under the pressure of his teeth. He played back their day, starting from the flight attendant telling him that his friend was ill to waking up in the hotel, tangled in sheets and Billy's arms. He rubbed his temples trying to figure out when things had change, because he was not believing the "I'm sick" story.

He looked out the small window as the aircraft descended over Glasgow. This would be his first trip to Scotland with Billy, and normally he would have been excited if there wasn't the tension between them. He watched as the passengers began standing, grabbing their luggage from the overhead compartment and rushing out the plane. He could tell that Billy was only pretending to sleep and Dom figured he would give him a few more minutes to himself.

"Bills, baby," he whispered, rubbing the other man's back. "We're here."

Bill struggled not to pull away from Dom’s touch. The need to confront Dom, to let him know that he knew of his duplicity ate at his soul. But he couldn’t. Not here. Billy knew that the minute the words left his mouth it would degenerate into a confrontation of epic proportions. He couldn’t do that while they were in the public eye. He had to fold his anger in on itself, until only his sadness remained. Of that there was an abundance. Sadness for the fairytale they had been living but now had lost. Sadness that yet again he’d held happiness in the palm of his hand and it had been snatched cruelly away.

Taking a deep shuddering breath he unclasped the seat belt and stood, his eyes downcast, watching Dom’s feet, tears welling in his eyes as he struggled with his emotions.

Dom stood in the aisle, watching as Billy did everything in his power to avoid making eye contact with him. Carry-ons collected, they walked silently off the airplane, Dom behind Billy, looking at his lover's, no he shook his head adamently, his fiance's sagging shoulders and closed-off body language.

The wait in the Customs' line was tense, with Billy moving to stand in another line, and not a word was exchanged as they collected their luggage. By the time they reached the counter for taxi service into the city, Dom had come to the conclusion that yes, Billy was in fact mad at him, and no, he had no clue as to what he had done wrong.

The driver greeted them warmly, putting their bags quickly into the trunk, and opening the door for them. Billy rushed in and sat with his body pressed against the other door, head turned towards the window.

Dejectedly, Dom slid in, knowing that the only reason Billy chose a taxi was to avoid having to speak with him during the ride. "Bills," he said quietly, not wanting to draw the driver's attention. He could see Billy struggle with whether to acknowledge him or not, and finally his head turned and sad green eyes looked at him.

"I...I just...I love you, Bills, and I'm really happy that I'm here," he rushed out. He saw Billy's eyes narrow momentarily, a brief flash of what looked like anger, before his head nodded curtly and he turned once again to the window.

Until a few hours ago Dom’s words would have warmed Billy’s heart and made him grin like a fool. If he thought hard enough about it he was sure he could convince himself that Dom did love him as much as he said he did. But for how long. He might love him and want him now, his whole attraction based on the amazing sex they had shared. But knowing that he had remembered their real relationship and continued on with the charade that was their life together Billy couldn’t help but wonder when the arse was going to fall right out of his world. Sure Dom thought he loved him now. He was thinking with his dick, not his head or his heart. As soon as his head got involved again, Dom would move on he always did, How many times had Billy seen with his own eyes.

No it was better this way. As soon as they got home, he would tell him. A broken sob escaped his lips even as he tried to contain it. As soon as they got home, Billy would tell him it was over.

At the sound of the soft sob, Dom's head spun towards Billy, his arm already reaching out to him.

"Billy? Bills? What's wrong? Talk to me, please," he pleaded. The figure by the door ignored him, sniffling every so often.

Dom glanced quickly at the driver then unbuckled his seatbelt and slid towards Billy. "Bills, god, what's wrong? Please tell me what to do." Dom tried to hold Billy, only to have his hands knocked away. His mouth dropped open as Billy's head spun around, tears streaming down his face.

"Don't touch me," the Scot hissed, making Dom recoil back as if he had been physically struck. Dom slowly redid his seatbelt, staring at the headrest in front of him, the sound of Billy crying and his own heart breaking keeping him company for the duration of the ride.

Comments

[billyslass.livejournal.com]

Argh dont stop there! That was brilliant - "the sound of Billy crying and his own heart breaking keeping him company for the duration of the ride" - was just agonizing. Omg cant wait for the next chapter!

[-vanillashake.livejournal.com]

Nooo. Don't make Billy cry. Don't make Dom cry.
Make it good for both of them. Please. ._____.
Too sad.

[emma-took.livejournal.com]

No! you cannot end it there, omg I need to know what happens. Heartbreaking to see Billy like this, but also for Dom and his complete obliviousness

[lynnemezzo.livejournal.com]

My heart bleeds for the both of them; let's hope that something good and true happens to make them both laugh and smile and love again!

[fromperdition.livejournal.com]

GAH! YOU SO DID NOT END IT THERE!
Bugger.

Eagerly waiting for the next part. Sure it will be brilliant.

[mystery-ink.livejournal.com]

Gotta admit, I'm not really sure I understand Billy's feelings, and why he equates "Dom lied about remembering" with "Dom only wants me for sex"... Sounds like Dom was right about being worried about Billy's reaction, but I just don't understand why. I could see Billy being hurt and confused, but this... feels odd. I think I'm missing something.

[loozy.livejournal.com]

I knew it was coming, and I think that Billy is quite justified in being mad at Dom for deceiving him...
I am mad at Dom, too, for lying to Billy for such a long time, and while Dom acted out of love, telling the truth would've been much better and healthier for their relationship ;)

[mystery-ink.livejournal.com]

Arrrrrgh!!!! post the rest PLEASE!!!!! You're killing us here - *G*

[mystery-ink.livejournal.com]

Hey, girl - are you okay? Thought you'd post the last (or second to last?) chapter by now; you've always been so prompt. And it doesn't look like you've posted in your journal since May 21. Hope you're okay. Let us know so we don't worry about you. Take care.