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monaboyd Feb. 13th, 2004 10:53 pm)
perfect-oasis.livejournal.com posting in monaboyd Feb. 13th, 2004 10:53 pm)Title: Reincarnation and Postage Stamps, Part 6/9
Author: The Phantom Writer![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
silentnumbsmoke
Pairing: BB/DM
Rating: PG-13
Feedback: See, it's a happy cycle: You comment on my story, I become intrigued, I check out your livejournal and a) add your AIM s/n to my buddy list (if you have it), and b) check out your stories that I've never noticed before! Then I'll more than likely comment on your stories! See? You'll just be doing good things for yourself! ;)
Disclaimer: 'Tis all fiction...
Notes: 1) As always, many thanks toairlia_vega!!!
2) This is an extremely important part of the story. This is the part where the title's elements (reincarnation and postage stamps) come into play. But remember... the story's not finished. There are still three more parts after this one!
3) I'm extremely nervous about posting this particular part, so... please, be kind!
4) This entire story was inspired by a single stanza of a song... it's interesting to think about what inspires you. (If you'd like to know what song/stanza it is, ask me. I'm not going to post it here because it gives away part of the story.)
5) Before you read this, I would definitely suggest reading Parts I, II, III, IV and V!
Part VI
“Ah, Mr. Monaghan… let me find your file.”
“Dr. Emmons, please,” Dominic interrupted, squeezing Billy’s hand nervously. “I don’t think you need my file to tell me if it’s working or not.”
The doctor dropped his hands to his sides sadly. “I’m sorry, Dominic.”
Setting his jaw, Dominic nodded.
Billy didn’t accept this information quite as easily. “Well, what about bone marrow donors?” He demanded.
Dr. Emmons shrugged helplessly. “Dominic isn’t high enough on the list. I don’t expect there is any reason for you to hold any hope in getting a bone marrow donor.”
Billy jumped to his feet. “Why the hell isn’t he at the top of the list?”
“Bill,” Dom hissed.
“Mr. Boyd, please. It may be hard for you to believe, but there truly are people who are in worse condition than Dominic is.”
“So… Let me summarize,” Billy began, pacing furiously. “He’s gone through three rounds of chemo. None of them worked in anything but bringing him pain. We started off absolutely positive that he would get past this, and now you’re basically telling us that there’s no hope. Now you’re telling us that Dominic is going to die.” He winced at the bluntness of his words; the reality of it. He rushed forward to take Dom’s hand, pulling him to his feet and towards the door. “You aren’t much of a doctor, are you?” With that, he flipped the man off and stomped out the door, Dominic right behind him.
The drive home was silent. Dom stared out the window, his ringed fingers clasped in his lap. Billy concentrated on getting them home in one piece, clutching to the steering wheel, his knuckles white. As soon as the car’s ignition was cut outside their house, Dominic rushed from the car into the building without a word. Billy allowed his head to fall back against the rest. He took in a shuddering breath.
Dom was going to die. Soon.
“FUCK!” Billy let out a scream, his fist pounding down on the steering wheel, the blare of the car horn making him jump. “Fuck…” he murmured, resting his head on the balls of his hands. “Fuckfuckfuck…” With that said miserably, he crawled from the car and shuffled up the front steps into his home.
“Billy?” Dominic was standing in front of him, his eyes wide, looking incredibly lost.
“Dom,” Billy opened his arms wide, welcoming Dom, who immediately rushed into his tight embrace.
“Billy,” Dom gasped, “I’m… so scared.”
“I know… I know, love. I’m scared too.”
That’s when the tears came, and, rushing to the bedroom, they made love, gently and tenderly. Afterwards, Dominic cried, sobs wracking his weak body as Billy whispered comforting words of support, memories, and, most of all, love.
~~~
“I’m not scared.”
“You’re not?” Billy wondered, looking up at his boyfriend. Dom was no longer doing chemotherapy, so his hair was beginning to grow back, but now he was confined to bed – doctor’s orders. “If you’re not going to be submitted to the hospital,” Dr. Emmons had said, shifting uncomfortably under Billy’s intense glare. “Then you really should stay in bed for everything but bathroom visits.” Then, later, as he pulled Billy aside, “Make sure he’s comfortable.”
“Nope,” Dom spoke proudly. “I’m a believer in reincarnation, remember?” He smiled. “I wonder what I’ll come back as…”
“Maybe one of your beloved trees,” Billy responded with a grin. (Then I’ll go and help save the trees since… since I couldn’t save you…)
“Nah. Y’know what? I think I’d make a great bunny.”
Billy didn’t even try to stifle the laugh that fell from his lips. “What makes you think you’d make such a great rabbit?”
“Well, I figure that I’ve got the two main traits you need to be a bunny. I’m happy and I love sex,” he beamed.
“True, love,” Billy smiled. “Very true. You would make a good bunny rabbit.”
“Told you.”
“I see the light now, not to worry.”
“Oh, I won’t. But, Billy… I see the light now as well.”
And just like that, the tone made an abrupt switch from playful banter to solemn.
Billy set down his book. “Dom…”
“I mean it, Billy. I… I’m so tired.” Dom spoke softly, and indeed, he sounded weary.
“Then you just need some sleep,” Billy murmured, reaching forward to fluff Dom’s extra pillow, avoiding eye contact.
“No, Billy.” Dom caught his hands and looked in his eyes seriously.
“…No?” Billy glanced at Dominic fearfully.
“No,” Dom shook his head. “C’mon,” he softly patted the bed, beckoning Billy to lie down with him.
Taking in a deep breath nervously, Billy crawled over, leaning back against the headboard, embracing Dom, who turned his head to kiss him before leaning back thoughtfully. Staring off into space, he spoke again. “I wonder if I’ll be on a postage stamp…”
Billy took in a deep breath, closing his eyes briefly.
“Y’know, Bills…” Dom started, “I’m not afraid, not anymore. This pain will be gone, and I’ll be a happy tree or bunny or whatever. You know what the only thing that upsets me now is?”
Tears streaming down his face silently, Billy shook his head and struggled to keep his voice calm. “No, what?”
“Leaving you. I feel like a warrior going into battle of sure-death, prepared to lay down his life… A warrior who’s prepared in every way except one, and that one thing, the thing that means the most to him, is tugging persistently at his heart, telling him not to go.”
Billy sniffed, his grip on Dominic tightening. “Maybe he should listen to that one thing…”
Dominic shook his head sadly. “He wishes he could, but… he has no choice. And the warrior knows that, no matter what, he’ll never be ready to part from what he loves most, even though he’ll have to.”
“Never?” Billy repeated, his voice shaking as he felt Dom slide deeper into his arms.
“Never.” Dom blinked furiously and took a deep breath, turning his head with his last bit of strength. “I love you, Billy.”
“I love you too, Dom,” Billy spoke earnestly as their lips met in a final kiss.
As he pulled away, he looked down into Dom’s unseeing eyes. “Dom…?” he whispered. “Dom…!” He shook Dominic’s body weakly. “Dom, wake up!” The tears fell freely from his eyes to Dom’s still, cooling face. “Dominic! Please… no,” he shook his head, unbelieving, before turning Dom’s body in his arms and hugging the unmoving body to his own. The body without a soul. The soul that had moved on to some lucky British bunny rabbit somewhere out there.
Billy raised a hand, pushing Dom’s beautiful hazy blue eyes closed. Never to be seen again. Closing his own tear-filled eyes, he pressed his lips to Dominic’s temple. “I love you, Dominic. Now and forever.”
Author: The Phantom Writer
silentnumbsmokePairing: BB/DM
Rating: PG-13
Feedback: See, it's a happy cycle: You comment on my story, I become intrigued, I check out your livejournal and a) add your AIM s/n to my buddy list (if you have it), and b) check out your stories that I've never noticed before! Then I'll more than likely comment on your stories! See? You'll just be doing good things for yourself! ;)
Disclaimer: 'Tis all fiction...
Notes: 1) As always, many thanks to
airlia_vega!!!2) This is an extremely important part of the story. This is the part where the title's elements (reincarnation and postage stamps) come into play. But remember... the story's not finished. There are still three more parts after this one!
3) I'm extremely nervous about posting this particular part, so... please, be kind!
4) This entire story was inspired by a single stanza of a song... it's interesting to think about what inspires you. (If you'd like to know what song/stanza it is, ask me. I'm not going to post it here because it gives away part of the story.)
5) Before you read this, I would definitely suggest reading Parts I, II, III, IV and V!
Part VI
“Ah, Mr. Monaghan… let me find your file.”
“Dr. Emmons, please,” Dominic interrupted, squeezing Billy’s hand nervously. “I don’t think you need my file to tell me if it’s working or not.”
The doctor dropped his hands to his sides sadly. “I’m sorry, Dominic.”
Setting his jaw, Dominic nodded.
Billy didn’t accept this information quite as easily. “Well, what about bone marrow donors?” He demanded.
Dr. Emmons shrugged helplessly. “Dominic isn’t high enough on the list. I don’t expect there is any reason for you to hold any hope in getting a bone marrow donor.”
Billy jumped to his feet. “Why the hell isn’t he at the top of the list?”
“Bill,” Dom hissed.
“Mr. Boyd, please. It may be hard for you to believe, but there truly are people who are in worse condition than Dominic is.”
“So… Let me summarize,” Billy began, pacing furiously. “He’s gone through three rounds of chemo. None of them worked in anything but bringing him pain. We started off absolutely positive that he would get past this, and now you’re basically telling us that there’s no hope. Now you’re telling us that Dominic is going to die.” He winced at the bluntness of his words; the reality of it. He rushed forward to take Dom’s hand, pulling him to his feet and towards the door. “You aren’t much of a doctor, are you?” With that, he flipped the man off and stomped out the door, Dominic right behind him.
The drive home was silent. Dom stared out the window, his ringed fingers clasped in his lap. Billy concentrated on getting them home in one piece, clutching to the steering wheel, his knuckles white. As soon as the car’s ignition was cut outside their house, Dominic rushed from the car into the building without a word. Billy allowed his head to fall back against the rest. He took in a shuddering breath.
Dom was going to die. Soon.
“FUCK!” Billy let out a scream, his fist pounding down on the steering wheel, the blare of the car horn making him jump. “Fuck…” he murmured, resting his head on the balls of his hands. “Fuckfuckfuck…” With that said miserably, he crawled from the car and shuffled up the front steps into his home.
“Billy?” Dominic was standing in front of him, his eyes wide, looking incredibly lost.
“Dom,” Billy opened his arms wide, welcoming Dom, who immediately rushed into his tight embrace.
“Billy,” Dom gasped, “I’m… so scared.”
“I know… I know, love. I’m scared too.”
That’s when the tears came, and, rushing to the bedroom, they made love, gently and tenderly. Afterwards, Dominic cried, sobs wracking his weak body as Billy whispered comforting words of support, memories, and, most of all, love.
~~~
“I’m not scared.”
“You’re not?” Billy wondered, looking up at his boyfriend. Dom was no longer doing chemotherapy, so his hair was beginning to grow back, but now he was confined to bed – doctor’s orders. “If you’re not going to be submitted to the hospital,” Dr. Emmons had said, shifting uncomfortably under Billy’s intense glare. “Then you really should stay in bed for everything but bathroom visits.” Then, later, as he pulled Billy aside, “Make sure he’s comfortable.”
“Nope,” Dom spoke proudly. “I’m a believer in reincarnation, remember?” He smiled. “I wonder what I’ll come back as…”
“Maybe one of your beloved trees,” Billy responded with a grin. (Then I’ll go and help save the trees since… since I couldn’t save you…)
“Nah. Y’know what? I think I’d make a great bunny.”
Billy didn’t even try to stifle the laugh that fell from his lips. “What makes you think you’d make such a great rabbit?”
“Well, I figure that I’ve got the two main traits you need to be a bunny. I’m happy and I love sex,” he beamed.
“True, love,” Billy smiled. “Very true. You would make a good bunny rabbit.”
“Told you.”
“I see the light now, not to worry.”
“Oh, I won’t. But, Billy… I see the light now as well.”
And just like that, the tone made an abrupt switch from playful banter to solemn.
Billy set down his book. “Dom…”
“I mean it, Billy. I… I’m so tired.” Dom spoke softly, and indeed, he sounded weary.
“Then you just need some sleep,” Billy murmured, reaching forward to fluff Dom’s extra pillow, avoiding eye contact.
“No, Billy.” Dom caught his hands and looked in his eyes seriously.
“…No?” Billy glanced at Dominic fearfully.
“No,” Dom shook his head. “C’mon,” he softly patted the bed, beckoning Billy to lie down with him.
Taking in a deep breath nervously, Billy crawled over, leaning back against the headboard, embracing Dom, who turned his head to kiss him before leaning back thoughtfully. Staring off into space, he spoke again. “I wonder if I’ll be on a postage stamp…”
Billy took in a deep breath, closing his eyes briefly.
“Y’know, Bills…” Dom started, “I’m not afraid, not anymore. This pain will be gone, and I’ll be a happy tree or bunny or whatever. You know what the only thing that upsets me now is?”
Tears streaming down his face silently, Billy shook his head and struggled to keep his voice calm. “No, what?”
“Leaving you. I feel like a warrior going into battle of sure-death, prepared to lay down his life… A warrior who’s prepared in every way except one, and that one thing, the thing that means the most to him, is tugging persistently at his heart, telling him not to go.”
Billy sniffed, his grip on Dominic tightening. “Maybe he should listen to that one thing…”
Dominic shook his head sadly. “He wishes he could, but… he has no choice. And the warrior knows that, no matter what, he’ll never be ready to part from what he loves most, even though he’ll have to.”
“Never?” Billy repeated, his voice shaking as he felt Dom slide deeper into his arms.
“Never.” Dom blinked furiously and took a deep breath, turning his head with his last bit of strength. “I love you, Billy.”
“I love you too, Dom,” Billy spoke earnestly as their lips met in a final kiss.
As he pulled away, he looked down into Dom’s unseeing eyes. “Dom…?” he whispered. “Dom…!” He shook Dominic’s body weakly. “Dom, wake up!” The tears fell freely from his eyes to Dom’s still, cooling face. “Dominic! Please… no,” he shook his head, unbelieving, before turning Dom’s body in his arms and hugging the unmoving body to his own. The body without a soul. The soul that had moved on to some lucky British bunny rabbit somewhere out there.
Billy raised a hand, pushing Dom’s beautiful hazy blue eyes closed. Never to be seen again. Closing his own tear-filled eyes, he pressed his lips to Dominic’s temple. “I love you, Dominic. Now and forever.”
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nnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooo
“Dom…?” he whispered. “Dom…!” He shook Dominic’s body weakly. “Dom, wake up!” The tears fell freely from his eyes to Dom’s still, cooling face. “Dominic! Please… no,” *sniff*
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*still crying*
I can't BELIEVE you're doing this to me.
I just finished listening to "Into the West" beofre reading this too, so of course I was ready to bawl already.
*still crying*
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not good
*wipes tears off keyboard*
at least this is only number 6
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Thats the first time I really, really cried at a fanfic. I'm just glad there are more chapters even if my beloved Dommie is dead.
*cries more*
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*CRIES*
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Oh my.
O_O
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oh god *runs away to be alone in the woods*
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This is the first fanfic I have ever really literally cried at. It was beautiful.