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[orolin.livejournal.com]

It would be different if he told Elijah. He has to face Elijah again the next day when they go to a bar or go to a premiere, or run round with bloody fake ponies in those fake smiles...

Lotrips - Dom/Billy, Dom/Elijah - PG - for toxica939, for making me smile


"We just smile – which I think is one of the best gifts that you can give to a friend... If you can make them feel good and make them feel up about things." - Dominic Monaghan, IGN Filmforce, December 16th 2003.

When Dom feels down, he calls Billy. In fact, whenever Dom feels anything, he often calls Billy. It's just instinct, he guesses, something that comes with Billy being able to keep him from doing Those Bad Things, and not because Billy has the most memorable number.

When Dom admitted to Billy that he's considered Bad Things, things worse than the drinking and the smoking and the meaningless sex he seemed to be having with Elijah recently, Billy knew exactly what to say. Billy has a gift for that, Dom reckons.

Plus, Billy is all that way away. A million miles across that fucking pond. It would be different if he told Elijah. He has to face Elijah again the next day when they go to a bar or go to a premiere, or run round with bloody fake ponies in those fake smiles. Telling Billy makes it much more simpler. Billy isn't here.

Dom often feels like he is living three lives and most of the time he doesn't know which one he is living. He could be the New Zealand Dom. The happy-go-lucky, mischievous one that runs around in hairy feet all day, or he can be Stockport Dom, that guy with no job going to Man U games because he has nothing else to do and not because he's just hoping they'll beat Villa that weekend. Then there is the Dom that he is sure could actually be described as "the real Dom", or at least the one he is at this moment. The Dom that doesn't have a fucking clue what is happening in his life. The Dom that feels like he has a constant hangover, not just from the drinking, but the lights and the sounds and all of this sodding L.A. stuff that seemed so much more easier when he still lived in England.

Billy doesn't seem to mind when Dom phones him. Usually Dom promises he'll call him at a normal, reasonable time, but by the time Elijah drops him off and he's sank a few more beers it's one, two, three a.m. and he can't stop himself from picking up the phone. Billy will be there anyway, picking up after the third ring and not sounding at all pissed off. Billy knows it will be Dom, and he doesn't mind. He has all the time in the world for Dom.

Billy will listen as Dom talks. Most of the time it's about random things, useless information that Dom knows that Billy doesn't want to know about at seven in the morning, but he tells him anyway. He's been out with Elijah. He's got the red shirt on today that Orli bought him for his birthday. He might paint that tiny box he calls a bedroom green tomorrow, green like your eyes. Billy listens, though, as if Dom is telling him the most interesting things in the world, and he'll never tell him to stop. Dom will ramble on for ages, sometimes forgetting he's even on the phone. Eventually he'll stop, and although Billy hasn't been able to get a word in edge ways, Dom will thank him, smiling when Billy says the same old thing - "My pleasure."

Dom likes that Billy pretends to be interested in his stupid, fucked up life. He knows that Billy gets worried calls from the others, and in a way he likes how they're all so worried about him. Not Elijah, though. Things are different with Elijah. They don't talk about those sorts of things, about all the drinking and the meaningless sex and how Dom seems to be spending more and more time in the same clothes, head pounding and only wanting to emerge for the parties and the drinking, and that oh-so-good meaningless sex. Because it's meaningless, and that's what Dom needs right now. He can't handle the commitment of meeting people when he says he will, keeping to timetables and going off to film these new projects. He wants to make it different, make it like it was before.

Billy has been listening to Dom all this time, keeping Dom sane, making non-committal agreement sounds down the phone, because he knows that's what Dom needs. Dom doesn't need advice, or some sort of shrink. He needs a friend, and that's what Billy is. This time, though, Billy feels it's time to speak.

"Dom, I think it's time to come home."

He hears Dom sigh, but he can't tell whether it is one of agreement, or one of these despair filled groans that his friend seems to be so good at all of a sudden.

"I'm coming, Billy. I'm on my way."

And Billy knows he is telling the truth. For the first time ever, Billy doesn't get that dread-filled feeling in his stomach the next morning when Dom doesn't phone him until eleven. It's a good feeling, Billy thinks, and he is glad that he is the one that is helping Dom through this. That he is the one that Dom chose to make him smile again.

The End

Feedback is much appreciated :)

~Kirsty