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monaboyd Mar. 26th, 2006 02:32 am)
georgia-mason.livejournal.com posting in monaboyd Mar. 26th, 2006 02:32 am)Title: The Indulgence.
Rating: pg13
Author:![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
georgia_mason
Summary: Billy's P.O.V. Takes place the night after, The Conception.
Notes: Doms P.O.V of this chapter will follow as NC17.
Disclaimer: Never happened....to my knowledge!
Rating: pg13
Author:
georgia_masonSummary: Billy's P.O.V. Takes place the night after, The Conception.
Notes: Doms P.O.V of this chapter will follow as NC17.
Disclaimer: Never happened....to my knowledge!
He was writing in his journal while I slept beside him. I heard the pen scratching and him turning pages over. I was tempted to turn over and tell him to turn off the light and shut the fucking noise up but I couldn't. I could only lie there, feigning sleep and imagining what he must have been writing.
It must have been his first entry since we started this...this thing. Christ, I hope he just rated me out of ten in the sack. I'd say I'm about an eight, at least. He will have given himself the full ten. Arrogant cunt.
But it's all bravado.
I know this. I know it when he is beneath me, almost afraid to breathe as I push inside. He is naked then, in so many different ways.
Stripped. Laid bare. Real.
It's when I'm hurting him that he looks his youngest. It's when I'm hurting him deep inside that he is at his most beautiful.
That is a far cry from the cocky banter he goes on with afterwards.
Like tonight.
We sat on the balcony and I actually smoked. I usually only smoke with a few drinks in me and even then, I don't know why.
He interrupted our lovely, peaceful silence with his overwhelming need to show me what a big boy he is.
"It's amazing here, isn't it, Bills? Almost as amazing as your amazingly sexy lover, eh? Well, almost. 'Cause I'm pretty fucking amazing between the sheets. Wouldn't you agree, William?" He stretches out on the easy chair, taking a manly swig of his beer. Asserting his authority. How ironic.
"You're amazingly self-assured. Borderline arrogant. Wouldn't you agree, Dominic?" And I copy his movements in my seat. It feels childish and ridiculous, but we're only having a laugh.
And he pouts. He licks his lips and sticks them out childishly and I want, so badly, to suck them into my mouth right now. But I won't. Because that's what he wants.
He rambles on. "Give me compliments, Billy. Give them to me in bulk or I won't let you exchange bodily fluids with me. I won't make you choke and scream and come and come and come in the manner to which you've grown accustomed. And then, where will you be?"
I'd be back in the bliss of our uncomplicated, perfect friendship. You silly cunt. "Well, I'd be in a pit of despair, Dom. Where else would I be? So...my, my the moon brings out the blue in your eyes. Aren't you something in this light? And your reflected beauty..." I pause and begin peeling the label off my beer bottle.
He waits patiently. God bless him. He's a fucking beautiful sight when he's pretending to be annoyed. Even when he is annoyed. "Yes? Well...? My reflected beauty, yes? You were saying?"
I sigh. I've sighed alot in the last few days and I know he's noticed because he passed a remark about it earlier on. I made him no reply then. I'm tempted to make him no reply now but fuck it, this is fun. "I can't remember what I was gonna say!"
I beam a childish smile of my own. I know my own strengths.
He acts unphased. He acts. He never fucking stops sometimes. "Yeah. I can understand that. People tend to get lost in my reflected beauty and plum forget what they're about. I've seen it happen thousands of times. Don't feel bad about it, Billy. I have a charm that sparkles like my blue eyes in the moonlight."
I suddenly don't want to participate in this conversation anymore. It's getting tiresome. I've felt alot of things around Dom since I met him but this is the first time I've ever felt boredom with him.
I let him prattle on. I just want to watch the waves crash again. I love that. It's hypnotic. It takes me away, in my head.
Crash
Crash
Crash
And on. And on. And on.
"Billy? Bills? William? Herr Boyd? That Scottish bloke who fucked me not two hours ago?"
My heart jumps when he calls me. I hate that feeling. It annoys me.
"Christ, Dominic! Can you not let me be for two bloody minutes?" Oh shite. Where did that come from? I close my eyes and take another swig of my beer. I take his gasp and stunned silence, hard.
"Ah fuck. I'm sorry, Dom. Sorry I yelled, mate. I was out of order. It's just that I'm so fucking tired lately and am a wee bit irritable. I snapped at Orli the other day too and I had no idea why then, just as I've no idea now. Take no notice. I'm old and cranky." I curve my smile up in what I hope resembles kindness.
He doesn't say anything back. He just smiles at me and chucks the beer cap at my face, hitting me square on the cheek. And that's enough. Well, it's enough for me but somehow, I get the feeling it's not enough for him.
After another comfortable silence, which I suspect he has given me out of his own kindness, he speaks.
"We could buy a place here, when this is all over. Couldn't we? It'd be great. A beach house for just you and me. With a view just like this and a balcony just like this and nights just like this. We could, Bills."
No we couldn't. "Aye. I suppose we could...I never thought I'd have a view like this. I never thought I'd have all this. It's amazing, what's happened to us in the last few months, eh?"
And fuck. I shouldn't have said that. I didn't mean what he thinks I meant. I can read him like a fucking book as he shifts in his seat and smiles at me again. It's a coded smile.
I love this fucker.
But for some reason, all of this feels just the smallest bit incestuous. I know that sounds stupid but we were brothers once. We were brothers and now we're lovers. How it happened, I have no idea. But I've tasted him and touched him and smelled him and I'm fucking addicted.
He looks so childlike as he crawls out of his chair towards me, shuffling along on his knees. And I'm gonna fuck that mouth in a few seconds. I'm gonna take and take and give fuck all back. And this stupid, amazing, manipulative, beautiful fucker doesn't give a shit. He just wants me to want him.
And I do.
Ergo, I'm fucked.
He nuzzles his face between my legs and he looks like a cat with a scratching post. But I don't care as long I can get off now.
I stroke his hair. I pet him. I unbutton my trousers.
He gives.
I take.
That's the new dynamic.
It must have been his first entry since we started this...this thing. Christ, I hope he just rated me out of ten in the sack. I'd say I'm about an eight, at least. He will have given himself the full ten. Arrogant cunt.
But it's all bravado.
I know this. I know it when he is beneath me, almost afraid to breathe as I push inside. He is naked then, in so many different ways.
Stripped. Laid bare. Real.
It's when I'm hurting him that he looks his youngest. It's when I'm hurting him deep inside that he is at his most beautiful.
That is a far cry from the cocky banter he goes on with afterwards.
Like tonight.
We sat on the balcony and I actually smoked. I usually only smoke with a few drinks in me and even then, I don't know why.
He interrupted our lovely, peaceful silence with his overwhelming need to show me what a big boy he is.
"It's amazing here, isn't it, Bills? Almost as amazing as your amazingly sexy lover, eh? Well, almost. 'Cause I'm pretty fucking amazing between the sheets. Wouldn't you agree, William?" He stretches out on the easy chair, taking a manly swig of his beer. Asserting his authority. How ironic.
"You're amazingly self-assured. Borderline arrogant. Wouldn't you agree, Dominic?" And I copy his movements in my seat. It feels childish and ridiculous, but we're only having a laugh.
And he pouts. He licks his lips and sticks them out childishly and I want, so badly, to suck them into my mouth right now. But I won't. Because that's what he wants.
He rambles on. "Give me compliments, Billy. Give them to me in bulk or I won't let you exchange bodily fluids with me. I won't make you choke and scream and come and come and come in the manner to which you've grown accustomed. And then, where will you be?"
I'd be back in the bliss of our uncomplicated, perfect friendship. You silly cunt. "Well, I'd be in a pit of despair, Dom. Where else would I be? So...my, my the moon brings out the blue in your eyes. Aren't you something in this light? And your reflected beauty..." I pause and begin peeling the label off my beer bottle.
He waits patiently. God bless him. He's a fucking beautiful sight when he's pretending to be annoyed. Even when he is annoyed. "Yes? Well...? My reflected beauty, yes? You were saying?"
I sigh. I've sighed alot in the last few days and I know he's noticed because he passed a remark about it earlier on. I made him no reply then. I'm tempted to make him no reply now but fuck it, this is fun. "I can't remember what I was gonna say!"
I beam a childish smile of my own. I know my own strengths.
He acts unphased. He acts. He never fucking stops sometimes. "Yeah. I can understand that. People tend to get lost in my reflected beauty and plum forget what they're about. I've seen it happen thousands of times. Don't feel bad about it, Billy. I have a charm that sparkles like my blue eyes in the moonlight."
I suddenly don't want to participate in this conversation anymore. It's getting tiresome. I've felt alot of things around Dom since I met him but this is the first time I've ever felt boredom with him.
I let him prattle on. I just want to watch the waves crash again. I love that. It's hypnotic. It takes me away, in my head.
Crash
Crash
Crash
And on. And on. And on.
"Billy? Bills? William? Herr Boyd? That Scottish bloke who fucked me not two hours ago?"
My heart jumps when he calls me. I hate that feeling. It annoys me.
"Christ, Dominic! Can you not let me be for two bloody minutes?" Oh shite. Where did that come from? I close my eyes and take another swig of my beer. I take his gasp and stunned silence, hard.
"Ah fuck. I'm sorry, Dom. Sorry I yelled, mate. I was out of order. It's just that I'm so fucking tired lately and am a wee bit irritable. I snapped at Orli the other day too and I had no idea why then, just as I've no idea now. Take no notice. I'm old and cranky." I curve my smile up in what I hope resembles kindness.
He doesn't say anything back. He just smiles at me and chucks the beer cap at my face, hitting me square on the cheek. And that's enough. Well, it's enough for me but somehow, I get the feeling it's not enough for him.
After another comfortable silence, which I suspect he has given me out of his own kindness, he speaks.
"We could buy a place here, when this is all over. Couldn't we? It'd be great. A beach house for just you and me. With a view just like this and a balcony just like this and nights just like this. We could, Bills."
No we couldn't. "Aye. I suppose we could...I never thought I'd have a view like this. I never thought I'd have all this. It's amazing, what's happened to us in the last few months, eh?"
And fuck. I shouldn't have said that. I didn't mean what he thinks I meant. I can read him like a fucking book as he shifts in his seat and smiles at me again. It's a coded smile.
I love this fucker.
But for some reason, all of this feels just the smallest bit incestuous. I know that sounds stupid but we were brothers once. We were brothers and now we're lovers. How it happened, I have no idea. But I've tasted him and touched him and smelled him and I'm fucking addicted.
He looks so childlike as he crawls out of his chair towards me, shuffling along on his knees. And I'm gonna fuck that mouth in a few seconds. I'm gonna take and take and give fuck all back. And this stupid, amazing, manipulative, beautiful fucker doesn't give a shit. He just wants me to want him.
And I do.
Ergo, I'm fucked.
He nuzzles his face between my legs and he looks like a cat with a scratching post. But I don't care as long I can get off now.
I stroke his hair. I pet him. I unbutton my trousers.
He gives.
I take.
That's the new dynamic.
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mmmmmmmmm. :smile:
i really like the dynamic you have going, showing only one point of view at a time. especially when we know (by reading the other pov's) what the other guy is really thinking.
My heart jumps when he calls me. I hate that feeling. It annoys me.
aw, Billy baby. you're falling, and you're falling hard. not to worry, i think you have someone right in front of you ready to catch you.
this last chapter gave me the feeling that Billy is trying hard not to put much store in them being anything deeper then temporary fuckbuddies. i don't think he wants to trust his heart yet.
i hope we get to see through Dom's eyes next.
kerry =)
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You will get to see through Doms eyes. Well...my Doms eyes at least.
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Cheers!
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